Dear Friends, how are you doing this month? Were you dreading it as much as I was? I’ve been disconnected in many ways, specifically in not feeling in the mood to venture into the fray this month creates, staying in small trusted circles until now…
Tag Archives: Adoptive Parents
I know I’m always talking about how you adopt matters, I’m hoping that today’s post offers you a chance to consider how the long-term impact your choices in adopting can play out and even be generational. Choosing the way to get that baby fastest, easiest, the shortest time post birth to relinquishment, or no revocation period, shouldn’t be what guides the choices you make, your ethics and morals should. Read the rest of this entry »
It’s a rare adoptee who would fit into the Either/Or category people like to paint us as, instead try seeing us as Both/And. Read the rest of this entry »
The intent of this post is similar to this post Looking for adoptee input on searching as the response was amazing and I thank each one of you who took the time to contribute. This time, it’s to offer a space for any adoptees who wish to describe the different times in their lives when they processed being adopted and how their feelings and views changed. What life events that triggered reflection, changes based on life stages/ages, understanding of adoption practices, or… Read the rest of this entry »
The other day a conversation took place between an adoptive parent and adoptee, things got somewhat heated. Days later it’s still bothering me and it took me a while to figure out why that was.
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Dear people adopting or even have already adopted – I watched one of the thousands of adoption video’s this morning. This is how I feel after watching it. Please listen to my words and consider them. Read the rest of this entry »
I’m old and most days can easily become grumpy at the drop of a hat. That happened yesterday on a comment thread on NYT’s FB post of an article. My grumpiness wasn’t over the article, it was good, it was because the PAL crowd got terribly upset in a how dare you way and we demand you fix it, and fix it now (which the NYT did)
Their issue in the headline: Given up for adoption… Read the rest of this entry »
The road to this post is sort of long, please bear with me. Mom’s parents immigrated from England to Canada back in the early 1900’s, if memory serves they knew each other in England before they immigrated. They married in Canada and lived out their lives there; this story takes place after they were all gone. Back then, trips home to England were few because you had to go via ship, but they stayed in touch with family through regular letters written in ultra-small script filling every inch of the page. So, mom grew up knowing her cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandparents though letters and stories told. When travel got easier (airplanes), mom visited several times over the decades, she would spend several days with each family, they also kept up the letters so everyone knew what was happening in the family. Read the rest of this entry »
I’ve tried every which way to help people, specifically adoptive parents in the adoption community to move on from labelling an adoptee as having either a positive or negative adoption experience. I’ve failed in all previous attempts and I don’t like admitting defeat, so here’s one more try…
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I’m looking for adoptees willing to weigh in on:
- reasons why you could and did tell your parents you were searching for your family of birth.
- reasons why you couldn’t and wouldn’t tell your parents you were searching for your family of birth.
- reasons why you chose not to search until your parents passed.
- reasons why you chose not to search.
- reason why you searched
- reason I haven’t listed
And if you could refer to all numbers that corresponds to what you did that’d be helpful so I don’t assume incorrectly. Also, if you care to share, about what age you started to actively search. Feel free to wander farther afield than the above choices if you’d like, you have the floor.
Yes, every adoptee’s story is unique. There are also similarities found in all adoption stories for the one adopted, and if you can’t see that, then I don’t know what to tell you on how to get there, but I do know you need to get there. Read the rest of this entry »