I stumbled on this paper and became curious, so I read it. It’s good, it starts at the beginning of adoption in the US circa 1850 and travels through the different periods of adoption history. It’s a must read, grab a beverage of choice and settle down to move through the many eras adoption has evolved through, while also keeping you up to date with what society was at that point in history.
It’s worth your time to stroll down the path adoption in the US has taken since the 1850’s.
David R. Papke, Pondering Past Purposes: A Critical History of American Adoption Law, 102 W. Va. L. Rev.
(1999). Available at: https://researchrepository.wvu.edu/wvlr/vol102/iss2/8
Tags: adoptee, adoption, adoption impact, adoptive family, biological family
Lately, I’ve felt that there really isn’t a point of trying to make adoption more ethical, or rare. Nor of making people think about the adoptee experience – both growing up, and living a life filled with blank spaces. Blank spaces that can never be filled, questions that will always remain unanswered.
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Tags: adoptee, adoption, adoption impact, loss, truth
“Once upon a time–we’re talking about the years up to the early ’80s-–secrecy and lies was the name of the game in adoption.”
“This is how it worked: Expectant parents who had “out-of-wedlock” babies were forced to give them away and then told to go on with their lives without knowing what became of their children.”
“Adoptive parents were expected to raise the children “as their own” without ever mentioning where they came from. And the children themselves had no idea about anything until the truth would accidentally slip out. Sometimes it would come directly from the adoption record. Other times it would come out as part of their parents’ deathbed confession.”
“Finally, they would have answers to the questions that gnawed at them their entire lives:”
- “Why don’t I look like my parents?”
- “Why am I so different from the rest of my family?”
- “Why are my parents so uncomfortable about talking about my birth?”
The above is from an Adoption Service Provider…America Adopts
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Tags: adoptee, adoption, adoption impact, adoptive family, considering adoption, Ethics and morals, telling, truth
Also known as Odds and Ends on this side of the pond.
First Up: The other day I went on Ancestry to see if there was any new hints in my main trees; ended up deciding I’d finally try to do Mom’s tree again. I’d obviously forgotten why I’d given up doing that tree in-depth, and I soon realized the error of trying to do a tree based in England, that also included branches in the USA, Canada and Australia. Nonetheless, I decided it was now or never, also, I needed it done to show someone on ancestry they were wrong with who they listed as the Matriarch of mom’s family.
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Tags: adoption, adoption impact, Ethics and morals, loss, truth
I have spent countless hours doing my folks family trees, and my family trees, as well – the difference between the trees of my adoptive family is I can recount so many family stories I was part of, and all the stories told I wasn’t part of, and yet can tell them, because they were told, retold and talked about over the years.
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Tags: adoptee, adoption, adoption impact, adoptive family, biological family, considering adoption, loss
Yesterday, I ventured onto a FB Adoption Group, one that seems both moderate and helpful to people asking questions. And no, I’m not linking to it, cuz you know I’m not into shaming and naming, nor was it the fault of the group, the fault rests solely on the individuals (yes, there was more than one) that chose to say what they said.
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Tags: adoptee, adoption, adoptive family, biological family
Having a hard time making any of my thoughts translate to a post, so here’s yet another try.
Just heard a middle-aged adoptee who was asked to introduce himself, who, after stating his name included “I’m adopted and I hit the Jackpot.” He was speaking in a situation where being adopted (or not) had no bearing on anything, they just wanted his name for the record.
It was bizarre to say the least.
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Tags: adoptee, adoption, adoption impact, adoptive family, biological family, considering adoption, Ethics and morals, loss