Adoption Then and Now

I stumbled on this paper and became curious, so I read it. It’s good, it starts at the beginning of adoption in the US circa 1850 and travels through the different periods of adoption history. It’s a must read, grab a beverage of choice and settle down to move through the many eras adoption has evolved through, while also keeping you up to date with what society was at that point in history.

It’s worth your time to stroll down the path adoption in the US has taken since the 1850’s.

David R. Papke, Pondering Past Purposes: A Critical History of American Adoption Law, 102 W. Va. L. Rev.
(1999). Available at: https://researchrepository.wvu.edu/wvlr/vol102/iss2/8

 

From 2016: My Story…

My Story…

 

I don’t think they thought this through.

The tweet below is why I’m writing this post, I also clicked the link below the tweet, a clip of that post is shown below the tweet.

 

Layers

Lately, I’ve felt that there really isn’t a point of trying to make adoption more ethical, or rare. Nor of making people think about the adoptee experience – both growing up, and living a life filled with blank spaces. Blank spaces that can never be filled, questions that will always remain unanswered.

 

Another Adoption Service Provider seems to not know Adoption History.

“Once upon a time–we’re talking about the years up to the early ’80s-–secrecy and lies was the name of the game in adoption.”

“This is how it worked: Expectant parents who had “out-of-wedlock” babies were forced to give them away and then told to go on with their lives without knowing what became of their children.”

“Adoptive parents were expected to raise the children “as their own” without ever mentioning where they came from. And the children themselves had no idea about anything until the truth would accidentally slip out. Sometimes it would come directly from the adoption record. Other times it would come out as part of their parents’ deathbed confession.”

“Finally, they would have answers to the questions that gnawed at them their entire lives:”

• “Why don’t I look like my parents?”
• “Why am I so different from the rest of my family?”
• “Why are my parents so uncomfortable about talking about my birth?”

The above is from an Adoption Service Provider…America Adopts

 

Right to end your adoption?

Adoptive Parents have the right to annual the adoption, so why don’t Adult Adoptees have the same right?

Gregory Luce @adopteerights is the author of the article below that made me start musing on the subject:

Adoptee Rights And Adoption Annulment

 

Bits and Bobs

Also known as Odds and Ends on this side of the pond.

First Up: The other day I went on Ancestry to see if there was any new hints in my main trees; ended up deciding I’d finally try to do Mom’s tree again. I’d obviously forgotten why I’d given up doing that tree in-depth, and I soon realized the error of trying to do a tree based in England, that also included branches in the USA, Canada and Australia. Nonetheless, I decided it was now or never, also, I needed it done to show someone on ancestry they were wrong with who they listed as the Matriarch of mom’s family.

 

Secrets Part Two

Most who have been here for awhile know CB, she made a comment on the post Secrets. A comment that expands on different comments made on the WAPO article that I wrote about in the above post, and one in particular from an AP. (that was hard to explain without me ending up confused.) Anyway…

 

Secrets

Every once in a while I read the advice columns on Washington Post or in the New York Times. Today, I’m doing laundry so I went and scrolled through the columns and found this one in WAPO Ask Amy.

 

The Loss Becomes Deeper

I have spent countless hours doing my folks family trees, and my family trees, as well – the difference between the trees of my adoptive family is I can recount so many family stories I was part of, and all the stories told I wasn’t part of, and yet can tell them, because they were told, retold and talked about over the years.

 

This is wrong any way you look at it.

Yesterday, I ventured onto a FB Adoption Group, one that seems both moderate and helpful to people asking questions. And no, I’m not linking to it, cuz you know I’m not into shaming and naming, nor was it the fault of the group, the fault rests solely on the individuals (yes, there was more than one) that chose to say what they said.

 

I’m still here

Having a hard time making any of my thoughts translate to a post, so here’s yet another try.

Just heard a middle-aged adoptee who was asked to introduce himself, who, after stating his name included “I’m adopted and I hit the Jackpot.” He was speaking in a situation where being adopted (or not) had no bearing on anything, they just wanted his name for the record.

It was bizarre to say the least.