I’ve posted this story elsewhere of sisters who were separated and adopted into different homes; the response was typical, shallow best describes the reaction and that’s the problem I see within the adoption community when it comes to the adoptee. Whatever the back story is for the one adopted, even if egregious, people in the adoption world typically only offer how lucky they were to find each other. Read the rest of this entry »
Category Archives: adoptive parents
I read a question to an adoptee who was just venturing outside of her own adoption about her view on open records, as if, every adoptee comes complete with unlimited knowledge about all things adoption. The adoptee responded by talking about their feelings and concerns on open adoption. I’m not sure why some adoptive parents still need to ask every adoptee they meet about how they feel about ‘open records’, and of course, they didn’t clear up the confusion the adoptee had between the subject asked and the subject of her answer given, hence this post. Read the rest of this entry »
Thankful for how willing adoptees are to not just talk about adoption, being adopted, but to also have the grace, strength and power inside them to tell their stories in ways that makes you feel them, instead of just reading them. Stories unique to each, and yet, weaving similar themes that run through their stories. It’s a gift for both prospective and adoptive parents that I hope they willingly accept, think deeply on, and challenge themselves to dig deep to understand. Read the rest of this entry »
Dear Friends, how are you doing this month? Were you dreading it as much as I was? I’ve been disconnected in many ways, specifically in not feeling in the mood to venture into the fray this month creates, staying in small trusted circles until now…
I know I’m always talking about how you adopt matters, I’m hoping that today’s post offers you a chance to consider how the long-term impact your choices in adopting can play out and even be generational. Choosing the way to get that baby fastest, easiest, the shortest time post birth to relinquishment, or no revocation period, shouldn’t be what guides the choices you make, your ethics and morals should. Read the rest of this entry »
It’s a rare adoptee who would fit into the Either/Or category people like to paint us as, instead try seeing us as Both/And. Read the rest of this entry »
The intent of this post is similar to this post Looking for adoptee input on searching as the response was amazing and I thank each one of you who took the time to contribute. This time, it’s to offer a space for any adoptees who wish to describe the different times in their lives when they processed being adopted and how their feelings and views changed. What life events that triggered reflection, changes based on life stages/ages, understanding of adoption practices, or… Read the rest of this entry »
The other day a conversation took place between an adoptive parent and adoptee, things got somewhat heated. Days later it’s still bothering me and it took me a while to figure out why that was.
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Dear people adopting or even have already adopted – I watched one of the thousands of adoption video’s this morning. This is how I feel after watching it. Please listen to my words and consider them. Read the rest of this entry »
We’ve been watching AGT for the last few years, can’t say I’m particularly a fan, but I don’t mind it most of the time. Except for the sob stories used to garner votes. I don’t mind hearing their back story of how they got to where they are, I just don’t want to hear a blatant pull-on-your-heart-strings sob story.
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I’m old and most days can easily become grumpy at the drop of a hat. That happened yesterday on a comment thread on NYT’s FB post of an article. My grumpiness wasn’t over the article, it was good, it was because the PAL crowd got terribly upset in a how dare you way and we demand you fix it, and fix it now (which the NYT did)
Their issue in the headline: Given up for adoption… Read the rest of this entry »
The road to this post is sort of long, please bear with me. Mom’s parents immigrated from England to Canada back in the early 1900’s, if memory serves they knew each other in England before they immigrated. They married in Canada and lived out their lives there; this story takes place after they were all gone. Back then, trips home to England were few because you had to go via ship, but they stayed in touch with family through regular letters written in ultra-small script filling every inch of the page. So, mom grew up knowing her cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandparents though letters and stories told. When travel got easier (airplanes), mom visited several times over the decades, she would spend several days with each family, they also kept up the letters so everyone knew what was happening in the family. Read the rest of this entry »