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Author Archives: TAO

About TAO

Just someone who likes to talk about what interests me.

So thankful for other voices

Thankful for how willing adoptees are to not just talk about adoption, being adopted, but to also have the grace, strength and power inside them to tell their stories in ways that makes you feel them, instead of just reading them. Stories unique to each, and yet, weaving similar themes that run through their stories. It’s a gift for both prospective and adoptive parents that I hope they willingly accept, think deeply on, and challenge themselves to dig deep to understand. Read the rest of this entry »

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Posted by on November 16, 2018 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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Yep, it’s that month again…

Dear Friends, how are you doing this month? Were you dreading it as much as I was? I’ve been disconnected in many ways, specifically in not feeling in the mood to venture into the fray this month creates, staying in small trusted circles until now…

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Posted by on November 13, 2018 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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How will your adoption choices be viewed?

I know I’m always talking about how you adopt matters, I’m hoping that today’s post offers you a chance to consider how the long-term impact your choices in adopting can play out and even be generational. Choosing the way to get that baby fastest, easiest, the shortest time post birth to relinquishment, or no revocation period, shouldn’t be what guides the choices you make, your ethics and morals should. Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on November 1, 2018 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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Both/And vs. Either/Or

It’s a rare adoptee who would fit into the Either/Or category people like to paint us as, instead try seeing us as Both/And. Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on October 21, 2018 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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Processing adoption over the years – input requested

The intent of this post is similar to this post Looking for adoptee input on searching as the response was amazing and I thank each one of you who took the time to contribute. This time, it’s to offer a space for any adoptees who wish to describe the different times in their lives when they processed being adopted and how their feelings and views changed. What life events that triggered reflection, changes based on life stages/ages, understanding of adoption practices, or… Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on October 17, 2018 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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Words, obscure words…

I follow Merriam-Webster on twitter, it’s pretty funny and educational at the same time.  Today is Noah Webster’s birthday and they’re celebrating by offering up obscure words in exchange for likes. Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on October 16, 2018 in Adoption

 

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Triggers

I’d be interested in hearing from other adoptees what triggers a reminder you’re adopted, or triggers deeper reflections of being adopted.  Read the rest of this entry »

 
22 Comments

Posted by on October 14, 2018 in Adoption

 

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Reunion doesn’t make it all better

Before I reunited with my maternal family of birth – I loved every reunion story I read, watched. Now these many years later I’m more likely than not to pass them by because of the emotions that bubble up inside of me, that normally, sit just under the surface. Emotions that run the gamut of happy they finally met, to sad for all those years missed, years when they should have built a lifetime of memories to sustain them throughout life. Anger at all the reasons why because of adoption that they don’t have those memories. Emotions from my lived reality. And often, a healthy dose of disdain (not the right word) for the reactions of adoptive and birth parents of being happy for them, because they can never, ever, understand how little reuniting fixes anything unless they too, have lived it.  Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on October 6, 2018 in Adoption

 

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The well-adjusted adoptee…

The other day a conversation took place between an adoptive parent and adoptee, things got somewhat heated. Days later it’s still bothering me and it took me a while to figure out why that was.
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21 Comments

Posted by on October 3, 2018 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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Strong Women

I watch women tell their stories and I’m in awe of their strength to tell them. To share their most private hard stories in hopes that if enough women stand up and demand change, that change will happen. A change that means men will no longer get away with treating women the way they’ve treated them throughout history.

And it is working, and not working, this week has proven that. Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on September 22, 2018 in Adoption

 

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Do you really need to share your adoption story to all?

Dear people adopting or even have already adopted – I watched one of the thousands of adoption video’s this morning. This is how I feel after watching it. Please listen to my words and consider them.  Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on September 20, 2018 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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Oversharing

We’ve been watching AGT for the last few years, can’t say I’m particularly a fan, but I don’t mind it most of the time. Except for the sob stories used to garner votes. I don’t mind hearing their back story of how they got to where they are, I just don’t want to hear a blatant pull-on-your-heart-strings sob story.
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Posted by on September 12, 2018 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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