Author Archives: TAO

About TAO

Just someone who likes to talk about what interests me.

Adoption Then and Now

I stumbled on this paper and became curious, so I read it. It’s good, it starts at the beginning of adoption in the US circa 1850 and travels through the different periods of adoption history. It’s a must read, grab a beverage of choice and settle down to move through the many eras adoption has evolved through, while also keeping you up to date with what society was at that point in history.

It’s worth your time to stroll down the path adoption in the US has taken since the 1850’s.

David R. Papke, Pondering Past Purposes: A Critical History of American Adoption Law, 102 W. Va. L. Rev.
(1999). Available at:

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Posted by on February 4, 2023 in Adoption, adoptive parents


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From 2016: My Story…

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Posted by on January 31, 2023 in Adoption, adoptive parents, Ethics


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I don’t think they thought this through.

The tweet below is why I’m writing this post, I also clicked the link below the tweet, a clip of that post is shown below the tweet.

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Posted by on January 22, 2023 in Adoption, adoptive parents


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Ancestry and so much more…

I was going to do a post on Identity, but then, I stumbled on the story below that is more fascinating than anything I’d have to say.

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Posted by on January 20, 2023 in Adoption, Ethics


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Lately, I’ve felt that there really isn’t a point of trying to make adoption more ethical, or rare. Nor of making people think about the adoptee experience – both growing up, and living a life filled with blank spaces. Blank spaces that can never be filled, questions that will always remain unanswered.

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Posted by on January 13, 2023 in Adoption, adoptive parents


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Happy New Year!

I don’t believe I’ve ever done NY Resolutions, although with my creaky old brain, who knows. The two of us did have a lovely Christmas and New Years, one worth repeating. For Christmas Dinner husband had a Pot Roast with all the trimmings. I had the potatoes, vegies, Yorkshire pudding and gravy from the Pot Roast, then we consumed far too many chocolates.

New Years Eve we splurged and picked up Chinese Food, something we usually did every year, but haven’t done since the pandemic started and it was so good, and now I’ve done it once, I’ll probably do take-out again.

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Posted by on January 11, 2023 in Adoption, Uncategorized


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Another Adoption Service Provider seems to not know Adoption History.

“Once upon a time–we’re talking about the years up to the early ’80s-–secrecy and lies was the name of the game in adoption.”

“This is how it worked: Expectant parents who had “out-of-wedlock” babies were forced to give them away and then told to go on with their lives without knowing what became of their children.”

“Adoptive parents were expected to raise the children “as their own” without ever mentioning where they came from. And the children themselves had no idea about anything until the truth would accidentally slip out. Sometimes it would come directly from the adoption record. Other times it would come out as part of their parents’ deathbed confession.”

Finally, they would have answers to the questions that gnawed at them their entire lives:”

  • “Why don’t I look like my parents?”
  • “Why am I so different from the rest of my family?”
  • “Why are my parents so uncomfortable about talking about my birth?”

The above is from an Adoption Service Provider…America Adopts

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Posted by on January 1, 2023 in Adoption, adoptive parents, Ethics


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The Year 2022 is almost done and 2023 almost here.

We had the Christmas we wanted, very quiet just the two of us plus the two cats. We also didn’t decorate because of the two cats. Tonight we are going to order Chinese food and pick it up, same thing we used to do before the pandemic happened for New Years. We’d do it to get me out of my memories that come to the forefront at this time of year, it has always worked well to have a change of pace.

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Posted by on December 31, 2022 in Adoption, Ethics, Uncategorized


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It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas

Good Morning my Friends! We have had snow and even more snow, and now, freezing rain – oh yay. The backyard is full of birds looking for a meal and fresh water, so many different birds, they’ve already eaten copious quantities of shelled redskin peanuts and shelled sunflower seeds, plus 4 packs of suet because it’s cold, cold and cold – somewhere between 10 and 15 degrees Fahrenheit.

I tried to make a list of the birds I’v seen: Blackcap and Chesnutt backed Chickadees. Sparrows, Starlings, Black headed Grosbeak, House Finch, Northern Flickers, Spotted Towhees, Dark-eyed Juncos, Pine Siskin’s, Varied Thrush, Crows/Ravens.

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Posted by on December 23, 2022 in Adoption, Uncategorized



Right to end your adoption?

Adoptive Parents have the right to annual the adoption, so why don’t Adult Adoptees have the same right?

Gregory Luce @adopteerights is the author of the article below that made me start musing on the subject:

Adoptee Rights And Adoption Annulment

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Posted by on December 17, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents, Ethics


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Bits and Bobs

Also known as Odds and Ends on this side of the pond.

First Up: The other day I went on Ancestry to see if there was any new hints in my main trees; ended up deciding I’d finally try to do Mom’s tree again. I’d obviously forgotten why I’d given up doing that tree in-depth, and I soon realized the error of trying to do a tree based in England, that also included branches in the USA, Canada and Australia. Nonetheless, I decided it was now or never, also, I needed it done to show someone on ancestry they were wrong with who they listed as the Matriarch of mom’s family.

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Posted by on December 7, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents, biological child


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Secrets Part Two

Most who have been here for awhile know CB, she made a comment on the post Secrets. A comment that expands on different comments made on the WAPO article that I wrote about in the above post, and one in particular from an AP. (that was hard to explain without me ending up confused.) Anyway…

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Posted by on December 2, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents


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