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Dear Adoption.com Columnist

I read your article posted a few days ago: 3 Reasons To NOT Find Your Birth Parents with the tag line “It’s your life; it’s your choice.” and just wanted to lay out some statements of facts before getting into a nuanced rebuttal.

  • You are an adoptive parent
  • You have written another ‘instructive’ article to adoptees before (title below)
  • You are not an adoptee, at least you don’t claim to be

Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on March 23, 2017 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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From the 2012 archives: The Things People Say prompt…

This post was part of a daily adoptee blogging prompt for National Adoption Month 2012, the prompt did nothing for me so I went with an alternative: The Things People Say

None of the questions are speaking to me, but the Things People Say prompt is, so going off script again, so to speak.  What I would like to talk about are the positive adoption statements made today that are so hard and fast that they deny any other reality.  Those statements are bringing back and/or continuing the stereotypical comments told to adoptees repeatedly throughout their lives. Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on March 22, 2017 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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The difference between…

Sharing your perspective based on your life experience and being a know-it-all-bitch.  Where is that line in conversations between groups in adoption and within groups? Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on March 17, 2017 in Adoption

 

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Wondering if anyone is like me…

I’ve wanted to write about this for a long time.  I’ve danced around it, alluded to it, but haven’t been able to talk about it directly.  Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on March 15, 2017 in Adoption

 

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“Gotcha Day”

I’m used to the mishmash of terms used by some families who’ve adopted and celebrate the day.  It works for them, hopefully if they see it doesn’t work for their child they’ll stop.  Still detest the term “Gotcha Day” for many reasons that should be obvious.  Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on March 1, 2017 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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The day the penny dropped that I had stereotyped based on race.  

How could I not know I had that stereotype inside of me?  How did that happen?  I wasn’t raised that way, I didn’t think that way, consciously, that is.  Yet, the stereotype was there, hidden under everything I’d always patted myself on the back about, and when I saw it, I felt overwhelming shame.  Not just for the stereotype itself, but for not knowing it was part of who I was, and how easy it is to fool yourself.  This post is embarrassing, but I also think that growth doesn’t happen in a vacuum, there has to be an awareness to change.  So, I’m sharing with you in hopes of sparking conversations here or elsewhere.  Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on February 18, 2017 in Adoption

 

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