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Category Archives: Adoption

More Post Roe – A Mix of Articles

The Editors of The New England Journal of Medicine have weighed in “Lawmakers v. The Scientific Realities of Human Reproduction

“The just-announced U.S. Supreme Court decision in Dobbs v. Jackson Women’s Health Organization represents a stunning reversal of precedent that inserts government into the personal lives and health care of Americans. Yet it was not unexpected. In the long, painful prelude to the decision, many states have severely limited access to reproductive health care. The fig-leaf justification behind these restrictions was that induced abortion was a dangerous procedure that required tighter regulation to protect the health of persons seeking that care. Facts belie this disingenuous rhetoric.1,2 The latest available U.S. data from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and the National Center for Health Statistics are that maternal mortality due to legal induced abortion is 0.41 per 100,000 procedures, as compared with the overall maternal mortality rate of 23.8 per 100,000 live births.3,4

Go read the full post linked above.

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Posted by on June 27, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents, biological child

 

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Knowing it was coming didn’t make it easier.

Adoption is a man-made institution that was designed to ensure children aren’t left homeless and/or parentless. What it isn’t, is an institution that magically creates ever-lasting bonds between a child and parent, if it was, rehoming would not occur, dissolutions would not happen, all types of abuse (including the rare death) would never happen.

But all of those things do happen and so much more that isn’t talked about outside of adoptee circles.

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Posted by on June 26, 2022 in Adoption

 

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Grateful

Just writing the word Grateful sets my teeth on edge; it’s one of the few words that trigger an emotion that raises my blood pressure which isn’t good. That and the term Lucky, although I don’t have the same visceral reaction to Lucky that I do with the term Grateful, (or any iteration of Grateful).

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Posted by on June 23, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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Reaching Out

My Auntie reached out to me this morning via email; it matters to me more than I can say. We aren’t in contact regularly, but enough that it’s an Auntie/Niece relationship that is not just friendly, but warm and inviting, despite it being mainly via email. She sees me as part of the family, as the elder she makes sure I’m not left out and includes me in any family news. She’s also keenly aware I don’t know many family members so she makes sure I know who she’s talking about when she has some news about someone in the family.

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Posted by on June 20, 2022 in Adoption

 

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My musings on what needs changing in adoption

The longer I’m around the adoption community, specifically, in domestic infant adoption, the more I see the need for so much change. Below are my views and ideas only. One of the most fundamental of changes I’ve come to agree could be better is federal regulation/laws for when an adoption happens vs state laws. I think it would be better than the hodge-podge mess of each state creating their own adoption laws. I thank Robyn for bringing that idea up on a regular basis and I do think she’s right. I also think with the pending decision from the Supreme Court on Roe v. Wade, that if it is ever going to happen, the sooner, the better.

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Posted by on June 15, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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No, We are fully human.

“WHAT ARE THE PROS AND CONS OF A CLOSED ADOPTION?”

“You have a lot to consider when deciding between a closed and open adoption. So, it’s important that you understand the pros and cons of choosing a closed adoption.”

“If you are leaning toward this type of adoption, here are some benefits that you may experience when working with closed adoption agencies.”

“A closed adoption may create more privacy in your life. The adoptive family and child will agree not to reach out to the prospective birth mother unless she allows it (and vice versa).” (bolding mine)

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Posted by on June 12, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents, biological child, Ethics

 

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Can’t come up with a title…

I’ve been struggling lately, worried my brain was getting worse, researching to find out more about my brain and the damage the stroke caused, and whether it could be impacting me this far out, or if something else was going on in my brain I needed to worry about. I’ve been doing this because not only has it affected my daily life, mistakes I’ve made that I wouldn’t have before, forgetting things all the time, lack of concentration. I was getting worried about what the future holds for me, and more importantly, how my other half will have to deal with it. None of the above was helped by watching my other half remain unchanged, he forgets what isn’t important to him, remembers in minute detail things he deems important, just like he always has. He’s the same old, same old.

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Posted by on May 23, 2022 in Adoption

 

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Rambling troubled thoughts about the future…

I’ve been watching the back and forth between the Know Nothing About Being Adopted Folk vs. Adoptees on different social media sites since the Alito draft on Roe v. Wade was leaked.

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Posted by on May 19, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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When you talk about finding your family by birth…

From 2016 – Read the post and then read the comments.

 
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Posted by on May 18, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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The Abortion or Orphanage Comeback

Originally written in 2010, I’ve made edits and added current happenings, including a twitter thread by USA Today. 2010 was a time when adoptees were starting to speak up online and adoptive parents weren’t liking it much, so many reacted badly. Since the Alito draft was leaked, the topic of abortion and adoption has seen a resurgence online, and the vitriol against any adoptee who speaks critically of adoption and/or is fine with abortion as a choice is swift and harsh.

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Posted by on May 15, 2022 in Adoption

 

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Adoption Needs A Makeover

It’s time for adoption to stop being a marketplace and to return to it’s roots where it was an option of last resort, but only after every other option had failed. And yes, I can see people get upset with the term marketplace, so lets talk about it, because, it is the reality today.

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Posted by on May 11, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents, biological child, Ethics

 

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Fathers must have rights…

Supreme Court hears case of birth father seeking custody of boy adopted 3 years ago

“GRAND RAPIDS, MI – The attorney for a couple whose adopted 3-year-old son is at the center of a legal fight told state Supreme Court justices that the family is the only one he knows.

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Posted by on May 6, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents, biological child

 

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