Loverboy’s Mike Reno – Canucks anthem “Flying High”

Yes, I am a die-hard Canucks Fan…but even if you aren’t a fan it’s a damn fine tune and video.

Video: Loverboy’s Mike Reno releases Canucks anthem Flying High

Loverboy’s Mike Reno, who now co-hosts the weekday morning show with Bro Jake on Vancouver’s Classic Rock 101, just released his brand new Canucks anthem Flying High, which he wrote and recorded with Ben Karlstrom.

The music video features Bro Jake and other Classic Rock 101 peeps, as well as Premier Christy Clark, broadcast personalities Shane Foxman and Bill Good and, of course, a whole bunch of Canucks fans.

Check out the very ’80s rock-inspired tune in the video.

 

Update to the Olivia Pratten case

Last week I posted Olivia Pratten wins court case that was a short news account on her victory for donor conceived individuals in BC.  In the comments I link to a more in-depth article on it.  I hope that it spurs some serious ethical discussions and changes based on the ramifications anonymous donation has on the individual conceived in this manner. 

Today I found the following details about why she won.

Digest: Pratten v. British Columbia (Attorney General)

HELD: Action allowed, in part. The provisions of the Adoption Act and Adoption Regulation, with the exception of s. 4(1)(e) to (h) of the Regulation, unjustifiably contravened s. 15 of the Charter, were not saved by s. 1, and, as a result, were of no force or effect. The declaration was suspended for a period of 15 months. A permanent injunction was granted prohibiting the destruction, disposal, redaction or transfer of Gamete Donor Records in British Columbia. Pratten’s claims for declarations under s. 7 of the Charter were dismissed. The omission of donor offspring from the benefits and protections provided to adoptees under the Adoption Act and Adoption Regulation was a violation of s. 15(1) of the Charter. Excluding donor offspring from the benefits and protections of the Adoption Act and Adoption Regulation created a distinction between adoptees and donor offspring. The distinction was based on an analogous ground, namely, manner of conception, and specifically, conception by anonymous gamete donation. Except for s. 4(1)(e) to 4(1)(h) of the Adoption Regulation, the omission of donor offspring from the provisions of the Adoption Act and Adoption Regulation was discriminatory.

The above link provides more than just the quote above as to the reasons why Pratten was successful in the permanent injunction against destruction, disposal, or redaction of donor records in BC.  From my understanding the decision was based on 15.1 of the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms and the BC Adoption Act and Adoption Regulations Act.  Both are well worth the time to read and hopefully other jurisdictions will look to BC.  Links to these acts are at the end of the post.

Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms

Equality Rights

15.(1) Every individual is equal before and under the law and has the right to the equal protection and equal benefit of the law without discrimination and, in particular, without discrimination based on race, national or ethnic origin, colour, religion, sex, age or mental or physical disability.

(2) Subsection (1) does not preclude any law, program or activity that has as its object the amelioration of conditions of disadvantaged individuals or groups including those that are disadvantaged because of race, national or ethnic origin, colour, religion, sex, age or mental or physical disability.

Equality Rights Background

By Kaelen Onusko, University of Alberta LL.B. student

What is Equality?

The term “equality” is difficult to define, as there is no precise meaning of the word. Canadian courts have interpreted “equality” to mean that every individual is entitled to dignity and respect and that the law should apply to each individual equally.

The entire article is well worth reading and goes into how the courts have dealt with specific other cases.  Further down the page it states:

The Supreme Court of Canada held that the purpose of section 15 was to protect vulnerable groups from discrimination. Discrimination was defined as “a distinction, whether intentional or not but based on grounds relating to personal characteristics of the individual or group, which has the effect of imposing burdens, obligations or disadvantages on such individuals or groups not imposed upon others, or which withholds or limits access to opportunities, benefits, and advantages available to other members of society.”

Further down it provides the clarification of human dignity from the Supreme Court of Canada.

The Supreme Court clarified the meaning of the term “human dignity” and what it was comprised of. “Human dignity means that an individual or group feels self-respect and self-worth. It is concerned with physical and psychological integrity and empowerment.”

British Columbia Adoption Act

British Columbia Adoption Regulations

 

 

Emails between those ‘mal-adjusted adoptees’…

The Adoptedones:
You live down south and there are probably nasty snakes there. Are there? I hate, hate, hate snakes – spiders are good, other bugs are good, most reptiles don’t scare me but snakes, nada. Do you have snakes where you live? We only have garter snakes and they make me run and scream, worse than mice and rats. Strange email I know but the question came to me while watching TV last night.

Shadow Adoptee:
And, oh, yes, we have snakes. Mostly just rat snakes, otherwise known as bull snakes, or chicken snakes. They sort of look like rattle snakes, if a person isn’t familiar with the difference, or accustomed to see them. Not my favorite critter either. I try to make lots of noise, and if hubby sees one he tells me, so I can avoid or prepare for the situation. I’ve had babies crawl up on the bench by the back door to get out of the water, and on my swing to sun. If hubby isn’t around, I hit the bench or shake the swing before sitting down. Mostly they stay clear of us, and we stay clear of them. They do keep the rat and rabbit population under control, so the rule, “Stay out of my way/house, and I’ll stay out of yours.” seem to work for all. We haven’t seen any poisonous snakes around here. Those would be shown no mercy, an immediately killed. We have had a couple of six foot bull snakes, but they avoid us as much as we avoid them. On average, we only see two, maybe three, a year. Two of my neighbors actually had a snake, somehow, get in the house, but we think it was, for one, when she carried in some large potted plants, and the snake had just burrowed down or something, and the other, from under the house. I have a concrete foundation. Nothings coming up through that, and I don’t bring outdoor plants in anymore…for obvious reasons. Lol

The Adoptedones:
You are braver about snakes than I am. I have my feet up just reading what you wrote.

Shadow Adoptee:
I just wanted to see how you were doing? Is everything O.K.?

The Adoptedones:
Just overall kind of in a funk. How about you? You have been noticeably
absent lately.

Shadow Adoptee:
I’ve been spending a lot of time outdoors, mainly just sitting and daydreaming, listening to the 500 baby birds in nest under my carport chirping. My goodness they are noisy. Of course there aren’t 500, but it sounds like it. The mom and dad bids are so very busy trying to keep them all fed. My gosh they work hard. They are accustomed to me, so they fly near me, land near me, and occasionally poop on me. lol had to move where I was sitting. The babies should be leaving the nest soon, so quiet will return to the home front. Yeah! lol

Shadow Adoptee:
I’ve spent all week putting squash, from the garden, in the freezer. I thought I was done, until last night, when hubby brought in another counter full to put up. Guess what I’ll spend the rest of the afternoon doing? I’m beginning to really dislike squash.

Fill me in on what is going on with you? I miss you and my other online friends. Hopefully soon I can get back to the blog.

The Adoptedones:
Seems funny to hear you are already doing veggies as we are just now getting sun and temps in the 60’s.

I MISS YOU TOO!

Shadow Adoptee:
7 quartz of green beans, and that’s just the first picking. I’ve lost track of the squash, but the freezer is at it’s quota on squash. Still waiting on tomatoes to turn red. Why does it takes so long for a tomato to turn read? Cucumbers, well, I’ve gotten one so far, and I don’t know what I’m doing wrong there. I should have cucumbers running out my ears. Bell peppers and egg plant are covered with blooms, but no peppers or egg plant yet, which makes me wonder what’s up with that too. Am I just impatient? All of Hubby’s hot peppers are coming on strong, and he should be picking them in the next few weeks. We’re trying to beat the grasshoppers this year. So far, so good. Oh, and there’s a watermelon patch, but I have very low expectations there.

I read your last post to the blog. You wont believe this. One of the first things I did when I lost my job was try to root some roses from cuttings off my only rose bush. Out of three cuttings, one took and has a bud. I’ve tried another, but it’s still in the experimental stages. I took the cover off today and the new growth, on my latest rooting, began to wilt. I put the cover back on and took it out of the sun. Hope it’s not too late. Anyway, if/when the bud, on my first one, opens, I want to take a picture and email it to you. The rose bush is only a stick about two inches tall, but the bud is a good size for such a small plant. I think it would be cool to post it to the blog in memory of your dad. What do you think?

The Adoptedones:
And I was just musing at the window that the apple tree is filled with blooms and we should get a good batch of apples this year. The tree is a 5 variety dwarf apple tree and they come on at different times, so I don’t have to make apple sauce as we are always up for apple crisp or pie after dinner.

My strawberries are blooming too – they sit in pots on the front stairs to get the most sun and hang over the sides of the pots so they don’t get mushy from all the rain. I get a cereal bowl full every couple of days through October.

Rhubarb is starting and the grapevine is just budding out. The grapevine was a gift from dad as a start off one from his that hubby moved from our old house in the dead of winter simply because it was from dad.

The Salmon berries are coming on and the raspberry canes are growing like mad but that is all I grow now. (Salmon Berries are like a very mild raspberry that grow wild here and have small thin branches instead of canes.)

Amazing about you planting roses like dad did – I hope they survive. I doubt I would be successful as I ‘forget’ as soon as I plant something now, and if it survives it is sheer luck. I am successful with sweet peas…

Shadow Adoptee:
I had forgotten that we have a small pot of strawberries. Actually, it’s hubby’s pot of strawberries. I love strawberries. Unfortunately, we can’t keep the birds, or squirrels, out of them, and we only got about five strawberries. Apparently, a squirrel had buried a pecan in the pot over the winter. A little sprig of green started coming up in the pot. Hubby, pulled it up, thinking it was a weed or something. As it turns out, the sprig was attached to a pecan. It was a pecan tree that had taken root in the strawberry pot. Hubby put it in a five gallon bucket, which we normally would grow tomatoes in. It’s grown quite a bit since, and looks like we can add it to the other pecan trees someday, when it’s big enough. We have four pecan trees, but rarely get any pecans. The birds and squirrels beat us to them.

I hadn’t heard of salmon berries before. We have wild blackberries, but there been so little rain that they haven’t done well as yet. We had some wild grapes at one time, but again, the birds keep the fruit picked clean. I’ve tried just about everything to keep the birds from getting everything, especially my tomatoes. Then there are the squirrels, rabbits, possums, skunks, and the ever so hated grasshoppers that will show up in June. The only solution I’ve found; grow enough to feed them all, and us too.

Keep your fingers crossed that the rose will bloom soon. I think I’ve rooted all I can for the season, as it will be getting really hot here in the next couple of weeks, too hot for rooting roses. I still find it amazing just how similar we are. Oh, and would you believe, the little birds that have nested on the carport have hatched a second batch of little ones? I thought they just had one set of little ones a year. Apparently not, because, I swear, it’s the same mother bird that nested there before. I’d know that chatter anywhere. Oh, well, I had a few weeks of silence. OH, and we finally have a hummingbird coming to the feeder Hubby bought me for my birthday. Just wish I could see it.

 

Did you really think adoptees only talk about adoption and how horrible it is? 

And yes, we also talk about other things and these are just snipits from our latest emails, but I still find it amazing that two individuals who have never met in person, live in different countries, lived totally different lives, can share so many things in common, not just the fact that we are both adoptees.

Here’s to great friends…

 

The right to know where you came from vs the right to be a parent…

For every action we take in life there is a reaction. It is our moral obligation to consider the reaction (impact) before taking the action.

My dad was the gardener with the proverbial green thumb. He could literally just sprinkle the seeds and they would grow on command. I remember the first time he saw my pink rose bush and when he was ready to go home, he cut one rose to take with him. When he got home he planted it, (who knew you could do that?) and now there is a beautiful rose bush that rivals mine. He also did the same each year by selecting the best of the harvest, flowers or vegetables, and saving the seeds for the next year. He did not approve of the neat tidy gardeners that did not allow automatic composing into the soil of spent vegetation, and who instead picked up any clippings, leaves, stems, and flowers and disposed of them in the garbage. He said that was the wrong attitude and doing that and then having to use chemical fertilizers and pesticides to grow their gardens, would destroy the environment and was selfish and they were only thinking of themselves and not the impact on the future generations. And he was right, just like he was right about over prescribing antibiotics and many other things…we see the impact now that he saw 50 years ago…but people did not want to listen, they wanted what they wanted.

Dad’s style of gardening is just one of the many examples he taught us kids on how to be proactive thinkers and human beings. Think about what you are doing and how it will impact others in the future, before you do it.

I can take the above thoughts and apply it to how donor conception is practiced. When the science was developed no one seems to have thought about the reaction of the end product – the human being. Corporations saw profits from a seemingly unlimited supply of people wanting to become parents. So they jumped in head first and did not think of the impact on the one most desired…People were willing to “donate” for a price and they did not think of the end product – simply the money or feeling good about making a dream come true for someone else.

No one stopped and said – hey wait a minute – what if the human beings created want to know where they come from? Or maybe they did and then used the same tired old argument used on adoptees – you should be glad to be alive and that should be good enough…

I don’t know what it is like to be a donor conceived individual, but I do know what it is like to live without knowledge of where you came from.

If people think it is okay to limit that knowledge to one or two classes of individuals they are wrong. If there is no reason why anyone should need to know where they came from, then take all babies born and give them to the next in line so no one knows where they came from. Pretty sure that wouldn’t fly.

If making non-anonymous “donation” the norm means less people will be able to become parents, then they have my utmost compassion for their loss – yet their loss does not trump the DC individuals loss and right to know where they came from.

 

Olivia Pratten wins court case

TELUS, news, headlines, stories, breaking, canada, canadian, national.

B.C. judge says anonymity for sperm, egg donors is unconstitutional

VANCOUVER – A woman born as a result of donor insemination has won her lawsuit seeking to end the anonymity of sperm and egg donors in B.C.

Olivia Pratten was conceived in 1981 as a result of donor insemination.

After fruitless efforts to obtain records about the sperm donor, Pratten sued the provincial government, arguing that the provincial law discriminated against people born from such donations because they don’t have the same ability to learn their genetic roots as adopted children.

In a ruling released today, B.C. Supreme Court Judge Elaine Adair agrees that the B.C. Adoption Act of 1996 is unconstitutional.

The judge grants a permanent injunction against the destruction of donor records in B.C.

But the ruling gives the B.C. government 15 months to amend the law to address the offspring of such reproductive technologies.

 

Elliot Krane: The mystery of chronic pain

About this talk

We think of pain as a symptom, but there are cases where the nervous system develops feedback loops and pain becomes a terrifying disease in itself. Starting with the story of a girl whose sprained wrist turned into a nightmare, Elliot Krane talks about the complex mystery of chronic pain, and reviews the facts we’re just learning about how it works and how to treat it.

About Elliot Krane

At the Lucile Packard Children’s Hospital at Stanford, Elliot Krane works on the problem of treating pain in children.

The Ted talk is under 10 minutes but he does an excellent job of explaining chronic pain and how they hope to find real solutions in the future. 

 

Just what is an ‘expectant woman’…

She expects to be a woman? 

Sadly in this context it the person is describing an expectant mother and by taking away the title of mother and replacing it with woman, has just reduced her to simply a vessel or incubator…so wrong on so many levels that I have no words to explain my absolute disgust.

Talk about insecurity in not wanting to even allow the title of mother before the papers are signed…but hey…no problem calling the PAPS adoptive parents before the papers are signed…or even matched for that matter.  How would an AP liked to be referred to as an Adoptive Woman?

Now I am angry…wow…not acceptable at all.  She is an expectant MOTHER and will be the child’s mother FOREVER just like Adoptive Parents are Forever Parents.

Ugh…and people wonder why adult adoptees shake their head and get mad.  How about trying to have a little humanity?

 

Couple of the search terms that showed up this week…

 

can you pay mother to adopt her unborn child

Really?  That is called buying a human being and buying or selling human beings is illegal…and if you do then you are participating in BLACK MARKET ADOPTION and it is ILLEGAL…

how to adopt without birth mother expenses

How?  Just say NO…you must remember all those PSA’s for kids about drugs – exactly the same – say NO and don’t bow to peer pressure…

 

Video: People and Power – Stolen Babies

 

Incredibly heartbreaking video that everyone should watch despite being just over 20 minutes long.  ETHICS matter.

For the commentary not in English there are subtitles, but even without the subtitles it is still incredibly powerful with just the English.

David Smolin is also part of the video.

 

It’s never the whole story…

“The truth is rarely pure and never simple.”  ~  Oscar Wilde

The running commentary by AP’s discussing an adoptee’s blog post can sometimes be frustrating, to say the least.  Some get it and choose to listen and be aware of the potential for their child to feel that way.  Others negate it as nonsense, or that it doesn’t happen now (and not realizing it is because adoptees have been speaking up that the issues are being addressed).  Some choose to pick apart words or focus only on one sentence or part of a sentence, and believe the author or the post is talking about ALL AP’s because the adoptee has not been slammed enough in the past, to remember to use all the right disclaimers in their sentence structures.

Thinking about the why this defensive reaction happens there are some obvious reasons; new to the world of adoption and having a limited understanding of the other sides, love for their child and not wanting their child to feel that way are two that come to mind, but I know there are many other reasons.

But what I want to say in this post…I doubt most ever really tell the hard stuff…it’s too personal, too raw to put on the internet…can you not just trust it is more than what is said, if we feel the need to say there is a problem?  That sometimes it is easier to point out the common to many issues and keep the deeper darker ones private?

Would YOU post an in-depth blow-by-blow of something incredibly painful?  Or would you find the least controversial aspects to highlight?  What if you were physically abused by your husband, would you describe how black and soulless his eyes became, as his fist curled tight as he drew back his arm and smashed you right in the nose, and then rained blows down on the rest of your face, then furthered pummeled you across your chest, arms, back, leaving you battered, swollen to the point your eyes barely open and covered all over in bruises?  Or would you say – my husband hit me…and leave the reader to assume it is more?

Please do not assume adoptees are any different from you…when it comes to posting raw, intimate feelings on the internet where if too much detail is provided or even just specifics, there could be the potential for others to be hurt as well.  And consider the adoptee may be trying to down play it or generalize it so you will even consider listening.

 

Anyone have any ideas?

Children’s Home is saving a century of Idaho adoption history

The organization works to catalog and preserve records that document thousands of lives

“The century-old Children’s Home on Warm Springs Avenue opened as a private orphanage in 1908. It sent its last adoptee to a new family in 1968 and now provides counseling for children and families. But 6,600 adoption records amassed over six decades are still there, kept in a long row of metal cabinets in the society’s attic.

The attic is a kind of time capsule in itself, painted a 1920s-era shade of gray-green and lined with closets where young residents once stored their belongings — if they had any.

SAVING THE PAST

The society is trying to raise about $1,500 to pay for staff to finish entering names and dates from the adoption records into a database. Judi Williams, an executive assistant at the society, said she averages a call each month from a former adoptee looking for information.

Some, like Newburn, want to fill in their family medical history. Others, said Williams, “just want to know where they came from.”

In addition to getting the basic information entered in the database, the society also is trying to raise $7,000 to digitally scan the documents in every one of the files.

Some of the files date to the early 1900s, and many of the documents are brittle. Some have fading handwriting. Fire, water damage or just the natural decay of old paper could mean the end of the documents — and the loss of the stories they contain, said Beth Gregg, the society’s marketing and development director.

Saving such irreplaceable records are important to the larger community, said archivist Alan Virta, head of Special Collections at Boise State. The Children’s Home files represent people who struggled, many of them anonymously and on the fringe of society.

“The documents reveal how society dealt with orphans and families,” Virta said. “These papers give an intimate look at those lives that started out in circumstances that were less than beneficial.”

The Children’s Home Society recently applied for grants from the Idaho Humanities Council and the Harry W. Morrison Foundation to pay for the project. Neither grant panned out, and the society staff is on the lookout for other foundations whose funding guidelines match the project, said Gregg. They’re also hoping for donations from the public.”

Much more to the story than what I have included here so go read it please…

Can we collectively help?  Any ideas?  Finally an agency that kept the files and wants to preserve them instead of saying they were damaged in flood or fire.   Thoughts?

 

I should know better…

I stumbled upon a mom’s message board and searched “adoption”.  I was amazed at the ignorance about adoption by the commentors.  There was a running commentary on anti-adoption people and I can’t count the sheer number of replies that said: “Adoption is wonderful” or some variation thereof.  Despite a few people calmly and clearly explaining that most who are labelled anti-adoption are against “how adoption is practiced today – primarily in domestic infant adoption“ the reply was spouted over and over and over.

How difficult is it to separate the act of “adoption”, from “how adoption is practiced today in domestic infant adoption”?

In “adoption” a child is taken in by another family and treated as one of the family.

In “how adoption is practiced” it is a discussion on a lack of ethics, transparency, and best practices; compounded by antiquated laws, or laws designed deliberately to favor adoption by couples over unwed individuals with a liberal dose of how to get rid of the pesky “birth fathers” and his rights. There are laws that are on the books right now in states that allow mothers to sign away their right to parent before birth. Laws that allow lawyers to act for both parties and the receiving party is the one footing the bill – can you say conflict of interest? Laws that have no revocation period despite allowing the mother to sign within hours of giving birth, that likely includes a least some pain medication, not to mention the hormones cascading through her body. Laws that seal away the adoptees original birth certificate, even when they reach adulthood. Laws that have not kept up with the practice used by adoption providers to entice mothers to surrender their babies to adoption with “promises of open adoptions”, yet there is no legal backing of that promise, or if there is a law, it has no teeth to enforce it.

Looking at the issue of how adoption is practiced in the DIA arena from a different angle – adoptees all over the states are working together to repeal the laws that sealed our original birth certificates from us, even when we reach adulthood. The adoption industry with the NFCA (whose membership includes LDS adoption agencies), and other agencies like  Catholic Charities, and adoption lawyers actively fight and lobby against repealing those laws citing “birth mothers were promised confidentiality”. That they cannot produce any document that states that, is an obvious flaw in their argument, and that neither surrender or adoption petitions included any claim of confidentiality for the “birth mothers”, completely refutes their arguments. I was always taught that only what is in the four corners of the contract counts…

But my actual question to those I talk about in the paragraph above is – if the “birth mothers protection” mean so much to the adoption industry – why have they not used their considerable weight to lobby for and create iron-clad laws that mandate protecting openness in open adoptions? Where are those laws to protect the “promise of openness” made to “birth mothers”? To me that clearly indicates they are talking out of both sides of their mouths.  In reality, they just do not want their incredibly poor practices brought to light and that the “adoptive parents” – are who they are really protecting by fighting against repealing the sealed original birth certificate laws and by not fighting to create iron-clad laws to protect “birth mothers promise of openness”.  As long as they are allowed to promise openness without a law with teeth backing it, they will be able to maintain the supply of babies to be adopted, and parents willing to adopt – and they will not be protecting their promises made to “birth mothers”.   How can they be so two-faced?

There are so many areas in DIA that need to be fixed – I wish people would stop and think about that before spouting how wonderful adoption is and how horrible all those anti-adoption people are who want things changed. In reality most just want adoption to be done right when it has to be done at all. Creating adoptees is no cause for celebration and throwing out statements “adoption is wonderful” or “what a gift a “birth mother” gives to a family”  – because those statements only looks at one side of a very complex issue.