Yes, My Folks told us we were Adopted and talked about it freely.

The article posted below by an adoption agency is inaccurate, read further to understand why it’s inaccurate.

 

#NAAM2020 – This Happened Four Years Ago

Four years ago Adam Crasper was deported back to South Korea. Mr. Crasper was adopted by US Citizens as a three year old from South Korea. Please watch the segment done on November 17th, 2016 telling his story on Seattle Station KIRO 7. Hear what happened to him.

You can lend your support in finally getting Citizenship for All Adoptees whose adoptive parents failed to get them naturalized before they turned 18. Please go to Citizenship For All Adoptees on FB.

 

 

 

Feeling Thankful And Hopeful

Yesterday was good, oh so good, historic, restoring. This morning I woke up thinking it’s a new dawn, new day.

Now hopefully good can happen, people can come together and change hearts and minds. And right now during National Adoption Awareness Month may the Adoptee Citizenship Act pass. I can’t think of anything more important in the adoption world than that.

 

Dear pro-life would be adopter…from 2015

(Lots of online discussion on adopting due to the recent SC nominee so it seems timely to re-up this post and hopefully make some think)

Readers know I don’t use the term ‘adopter’ lightly, and it applies only to a few out there. I read a very disturbing post today by someone with infertility, who is pro-life and also wants to adopt. I was ready to rebut her post, it felt good writing thoughts down, but it wouldn’t have done any good.  Instead, I decided to write this post, perhaps she’ll read it, or someone just like her. Perhaps it will trigger reflection, perhaps not, but I’ve tried in the kindest way I know…

She’s not ready to adopt…

 

Musing on Adoption and More

When did it become okay to treat Adoptive Parents as the enemy? Yes, they benefit from how adoption is currently practiced and many of the practices are wrong anyway you look at it, but the question remains – when did it become okay to be nasty for the sake of being nasty?

Maybe I’m just too old to understand.

Maybe the other Adoptees are right and I’m wrong.

Maybe I’m right and they are the ones who can’t see that being nasty doesn’t work.

Maybe the world changed; people changed and shaming is the only way to change anything. If that is true then we are all in a heap of trouble with no way to move into a kinder, gentler world. I hope not.

 

Muddling two different adoption subjects into one?

No, Adoptee Rights Legislation passed in a particular state through the hard work of adoptees does not mean the state is an “open adoption state”. Is there no editor at adoption.com?

 

Difference between open adoption and open records

I read a question to an adoptee who was just venturing outside of her own adoption about her view on open records, as if, every adoptee comes complete with unlimited knowledge about all things adoption. The adoptee responded by talking about their feelings and concerns on open adoption. I’m not sure why some adoptive parents still need to ask every adoptee they meet about how they feel about ‘open records’, and of course, they didn’t clear up the confusion the adoptee had between the subject asked and the subject of her answer given, hence this post.

 

Twitter thread

Sigh…

Before you dive in, read the definition of legal fiction that happens in adoption which is pertinent to the thread.

 

Family tree and adoption collide

First off, thank you all for reading the guest post by Tiffany, the shares and number of visitors tell me how much everyone appreciated the story told, the comments were also appreciated and the conversation good.  If you missed it, read it here.  My hope is that Tiffany will write other posts here as well.

This last week I’ve filled in gaps in Dad’s family tree by researching the siblings lines of dad’s direct line ancestors, there’s plenty when you go back 400 years and I’ve been hit or miss in this area because they all seem to have had 10+ kids, who then had 10+ kids.  Having said that, until now, I thought us kids were the only adopted ones in the family, but it turns out there was another adoptee. 

 

Adoptee Rights?

When I first came online there was only a handful of sites where you could reach out and find information on how to search for your birth family.  There were members on those sites that would guide you to adoption registries, explain how to get your non-identifying information from the agency or state, or if you were lucky, you were born in one of the handful of states you could order your original birth certificate (OBC).  I knew nothing about the Adoptee Rights fight to get our rights back.  I didn’t even know I could get my non-id information, nor that I even had an original birth certificate somewhere.  I’ve learned a lot since then about clean vs. compromise Adoptee Rights legislation.  Lately, two things have become exceedingly clear to me:

 

Judging crediblity and worth in adoption circles

Mixed adoption conversations, whether it is another adoptee, a first mom or adoptive mom that bluntly asks, or hints at wanting to know if: a) you’re grateful, b) if you love your parents, c) if you’d choose to be adopted, d) who you consider to be your real parents.  Now, most aren’t that blunt, but it seems like most want to know the answers to those questions.  Almost as though, how you answer those questions / tell your story determines whether they will listen to what you have to say, or write you off, there is no middle of the road, it’s either/or, and it’s wrong.

 

Trying to get back on track and talk about what’s important…

I’ve had a hard time this year being able to focus on writing a post about any one subject, I can write snippets, but being able to shut off all the distractions in today’s world has often proven beyond my ability.  One thought that keeps repeating itself every time I see what’s happening in the world is “I’m glad mom and dad aren’t here to see what is happening”.  A thought I never imagined I’d ever have, let alone being willing to say out loud, but I am glad they aren’t here to see the bizarre, ugly, mean-spirited happenings in this world.  It’s ugly out there and I don’t know if it can be fixed.  Yet, the other day I reached out to you, and you responded that proved there are still good people willing to reach back.  Thank you my friends, those that commented, those that took the time to read, you ground me, all of you, you make sure I don’t feel alone in a world that has overnight become very foreign.  Now, enough of me blathering, lets talk about something else…