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Tag Archives: truth

Missing Pieces

I think one of the hardest aspects to accept is knowing my missing pieces, will always be missing.

Where was I before I was adopted?

Did I stay in hospital the whole time?

Or was I moved to a foster home as I was told?

How was I treated, wherever I was?

Who cared for me?

Was I just left in a crib to cry it out?

Or was I given something to keep me quiet?

And if yes, is that why I cried non-stop for months if not held?

Why did the state not have a non-identifying report for me?

Why did the story given to mom and dad not match the story my aunt told me decades later?

Why does it all matter so much to me many decades later now that I’m on the downhill side of life?

 
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Posted by on September 12, 2022 in Adoption, Ethics

 

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AP’s need to be educated before they adopt.

Yesterday, my old post on “The Chosen Child” showed up in the stats, a post from way back in 2011, one that was a 5 video series from the 1960’s in NY on adoption and adopting that I’d found on YouTube. YouTube isn’t a place I go to except for music, but thought maybe there were videos worth sharing. So I went to look and landed on a page with a video by an Adoptive Mother about 5 Things She Didn’t Know About Adoption before she’d adopted that she wanted to share. She seemed pleasant enough, so I sat through her discussing the 5 things she’d wished she’d known before adopting. Below isn’t what she said, just my scribbled one-liners of each point she talked about. I’m not linking to it as it appears she’s written a book all about it, which seems to be the reason for the video…

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Posted by on September 4, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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From 2019 and 2021: I know an adoptee who is just fine being adopted….

Two posts, two years apart, similar and different, or both/and, both with the same title.

2019 post here

2021 post here

It’s odd I titled both posts the same, I don’t think I realized it until I decided to do this post, it’s also not odd because my brain glitches more than I like.

Cheers

 
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Posted by on September 4, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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Revisiting the post Revolving cradles

Seeing as Safe Haven has become a point of interest to many, thought it time to repost this post (below) on Revolving Cradles. Skim parts of this post if you must, but pay attention to what they figured out worked better than Revolving Cradles (now called Save Haven Boxes) across Europe in the mid 1800’s.

 
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Posted by on August 7, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents, biological child, Ethics

 

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From the archives…

Post from 2013 that was very personal for me to write, and one that I think is worth reposting now so people adopting today, and in the future, will try to walk in the shoes of the first family too. Also, read the comments on the post linked below, because they complete the picture I tried to paint.

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Posted by on July 29, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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Knowing it was coming didn’t make it easier.

Adoption is a man-made institution that was designed to ensure children aren’t left homeless and/or parentless. What it isn’t, is an institution that magically creates ever-lasting bonds between a child and parent, if it was, rehoming would not occur, dissolutions would not happen, all types of abuse (including the rare death) would never happen.

But all of those things do happen and so much more that isn’t talked about outside of adoptee circles.

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Posted by on June 26, 2022 in Adoption

 

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The lie always finds the light in the end

From 2018 – The lie always finds the light in the end

While this post has nothing to do with adoption, it has everything to do with adoption and learning the moral of the story, that the lie always rises to the surface one day.

 
 

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Reunion story and more…

Stumbled on a newspaper reunion article from 2018. The Adoptee was a Cole Baby adoption.

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Posted by on April 13, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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Microaggressions in Adoption

Adoption Microaggressions Parents Need to Know About podcast on Creating A Family with guest Dr. Amanda Baden, interesting and worth your time, it ends talking about Chimanda Ngozi Adichie and The Danger of the Single Story (her Ted Talk on it is linked below).

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Posted by on April 2, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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Another “we weren’t told we were adopted post”…

Adoption has come a long way in the past 50 years. Adoptions were almost always kept secret and not always a birth parent’s choice back then. Fortunately, open adoption is the norm today. While there can always be issues, studies have shown that this type of adoption provides the most benefits for the birth parents, adoptive parents, and, most importantly, the adopted child.”

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Posted by on March 13, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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So, you had a good adoption experience.

I’m in a few different types of adoption groups on fb, a few I even regularly comment in, mostly though, I just check in to see if anything sparks my interest. Lately, there seems to be a few more adoptees joining groups who had a ‘good adoption experience’ and want to make sure everyone in whatever group they’ve joined, know how they feel.

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Posted by on March 3, 2022 in Adoption

 

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New Year’s Day 2022

“Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in a while, or the light won’t come in.” — Alan Alda

We’d all be better if we took the advice above, myself included.

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Posted by on January 1, 2022 in Uncategorized

 

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