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Birthdays & Names

02 Feb

If you are adopted…

And adopted shortly after birth…

Do you love your birthday?

  • Or do you hate your birthday?
  • Or do you have mixed feelings about the day you lost your family?

Were you named on your original birth certificate?

  • Or does your original birth certificate simply show a generic Baby+Sex on your original birth certificate?
  • Or you don’t know whether or if what you were named on your original birth certificate because you aren’t allowed to get it?

Were you adopted when you were old enough to remember having a name?

  • Were you renamed?
  • If yes, how do you feel about being were renamed?
  • If no, do you wish you had been renamed?

Feel free to add and answer questions in the comments. Or go in a different tangent altogether. Maybe just catch up with each other and tell us what’s new with you.

 
3 Comments

Posted by on February 2, 2021 in Adoption

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

3 responses to “Birthdays & Names

  1. cb

    February 3, 2021 at 3:38 am

    I am an April Fool so I quite like my birthday because of being able to play jokes in the morning. Having said that, my big bro once got me an empty shoebox for my birthday as an April Fool joke – he was banned from doing that ever again lol.

    Now that I am in reunion with exte4nded family, I can now see that my birthday may have been a hard day for my bmother since in those days, they often weren’t allowed to see their babies once they gave birth.

    As for the actual day of the year, it is a lovely time of the year weatherwise (early autumn here) so I try to take my “birthday week” off. This year it is close to Easter.

    As for my name, there is a name on my OBC (Helen) but I don’t know if my bmother gave it to me or wehther it was the nurses at the hospital (the adoption organisation had their own maternity hospital). In fact, I worked out the name of the adoption organisation from the name of the hospital (which is mentioned on my OBC). The fact that the “place of birth” is given as the hospital makes me think that was probably one of the nurses who named me. On the other hand, the place of birth given for my bmother was something only she would know. I am thankful at least that she gave her full name and the place of birth because it helped me to find her easily (although sadly by the time I found her, it was a cemetery record I found). She could easily have just given first and last name and the state and it would have been much harder to find her then. I prefer the name I have now but am still glad there was at least a name on there even if I will never know who it was who gave me that name.

    Liked by 2 people

     
  2. beth62

    February 3, 2021 at 3:15 pm

    I’ve loved and hated, as well as dreaded and invited, my birthday for many decades.
    I’ve accepted that I plan to continue that for many more 🙂
    I’ve learned to expect and plan for the mixed emotions every year. Some years are harder than others. I’ve gotten good at it I think. Who knows, I’ll age a decade in one night next year, there’s likely to be a party, so we’ll see how it goes LOL The big ones seem to call for more reflection. And has more attention called to it. This year I forgot how old I was. Not sure if that’s a good sign or not. When my father called to wish me a happy one, he said my age, I argued and did the math. My math was right, but for some reason I had 2020 instead of 2021 in my equation… my father enjoyed that very much. He’s probably still laughing. In my defense, he called at 7am. I feel like that has happened before, but I can’t really remember LOL
    I hate to say it, but this year was made easier by not having to see anyone. More easy and more sad. I rested well at home and talked on the phone all day. It was a peaceful one.

    I was named by my mother. And I’m thankful for it, even tho she didn’t remember what she had named me. I can imagine how disturbing it might be not to be named. I believe it would disturb me.
    It disturbs me greatly that on our day of birth my mother and I were not permitted to see each other, at all, they immediately removed me from the room, both of us screaming, then drugged her. She said she wasn’t real sure what came out of her, she never got to see me, but still hears me crying. She called it her punishment. If that’s not an absolutely horrible thing to do to any mother, on purpose, I don’t know what is. Starts a fire in me.

    I was told my original name by my parents. I was told my mother’s name by my parents. But only because my Dad read the forms on the desk with his upside down reading skills and super dad vision.
    My parents were not told my mother’s name or my name. My father’s name was not listed on my record of birth, he was not told I existed or was being placed for Adoption, so he wouldn’t be able to interfere. He was listed in the agencies records, by name with an address and phone number – that is blacked out in my non-id.
    I am still not able to gain access to my original record of birth, or identifying information of my mother or father, from the state. I cheated and bribed for over 20 years to gain enough information to locate my family and make contact.

    I think birthdays and names come in the same pot for me. I certainly think of that day of birth baby with a different name that I once was, every year, all year, especially every birthday. Birthdays call her out to party, by name, some years in a big way. Like a giant raging monster baby with really sharp teeth and a P32 modulator ready to blow up the world!

    The rest that touches my birth and naming just makes me cuss terribly, often uncontrollably. But not nearly as much since I managed to find everybody, anyway, against all odds and bets. Here’s when the rage tends to fly #$%^^ %$#$% *&^%$ ^%$#@ (*&^%$ $%^& *&^%$# %@$%@! can you believe that $#^%$# #$%^!! it’s 2021 #@$% !@%$# wtf!ftw!

    Gotta run, I get my first covid vaccine today! Yay!!

    Liked by 3 people

     
    • TAO

      February 3, 2021 at 7:14 pm

      Yay Beth. Will respond more, the milestone birthdays for sure create more feelings.

      Liked by 1 person

       

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