RSS

Tag Archives: biological family

Adoption Then and Now

I stumbled on this paper and became curious, so I read it. It’s good, it starts at the beginning of adoption in the US circa 1850 and travels through the different periods of adoption history. It’s a must read, grab a beverage of choice and settle down to move through the many eras adoption has evolved through, while also keeping you up to date with what society was at that point in history.

It’s worth your time to stroll down the path adoption in the US has taken since the 1850’s.

David R. Papke, Pondering Past Purposes: A Critical History of American Adoption Law, 102 W. Va. L. Rev.
(1999). Available at: https://researchrepository.wvu.edu/wvlr/vol102/iss2/8

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on February 4, 2023 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

Tags: , , , ,

I don’t think they thought this through.

The tweet below is why I’m writing this post, I also clicked the link below the tweet, a clip of that post is shown below the tweet.

Read the rest of this entry »
 
8 Comments

Posted by on January 22, 2023 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

Tags: , , ,

The Year 2022 is almost done and 2023 almost here.

We had the Christmas we wanted, very quiet just the two of us plus the two cats. We also didn’t decorate because of the two cats. Tonight we are going to order Chinese food and pick it up, same thing we used to do before the pandemic happened for New Years. We’d do it to get me out of my memories that come to the forefront at this time of year, it has always worked well to have a change of pace.

Read the rest of this entry »
 
Leave a comment

Posted by on December 31, 2022 in Adoption, Ethics, Uncategorized

 

Tags: , , , , , ,

Secrets Part Two

Most who have been here for awhile know CB, she made a comment on the post Secrets. A comment that expands on different comments made on the WAPO article that I wrote about in the above post, and one in particular from an AP. (that was hard to explain without me ending up confused.) Anyway…

Read the rest of this entry »
 
5 Comments

Posted by on December 2, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

Tags: , , , , , ,

Secrets

Every once in a while I read the advice columns on Washington Post or in the New York Times. Today, I’m doing laundry so I went and scrolled through the columns and found this one in WAPO Ask Amy.

Read the rest of this entry »
 
19 Comments

Posted by on November 27, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

Tags: , , , , ,

The Loss Becomes Deeper

I have spent countless hours doing my folks family trees, and my family trees, as well – the difference between the trees of my adoptive family is I can recount so many family stories I was part of, and all the stories told I wasn’t part of, and yet can tell them, because they were told, retold and talked about over the years.

Read the rest of this entry »
 
8 Comments

Posted by on November 20, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents, biological child

 

Tags: , , , , , ,

This is wrong any way you look at it.

Yesterday, I ventured onto a FB Adoption Group, one that seems both moderate and helpful to people asking questions. And no, I’m not linking to it, cuz you know I’m not into shaming and naming, nor was it the fault of the group, the fault rests solely on the individuals (yes, there was more than one) that chose to say what they said.

Read the rest of this entry »
 
6 Comments

Posted by on November 14, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents, Ethics

 

Tags: , , ,

I’m still here

Having a hard time making any of my thoughts translate to a post, so here’s yet another try.

Just heard a middle-aged adoptee who was asked to introduce himself, who, after stating his name included “I’m adopted and I hit the Jackpot.” He was speaking in a situation where being adopted (or not) had no bearing on anything, they just wanted his name for the record.

It was bizarre to say the least.

Read the rest of this entry »
 
10 Comments

Posted by on November 3, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

Tags: , , , , , , ,

Adoptee Loyalty from 2016

The feelings of loyalty that I feel (and expect others feel in varying degrees) can play a significant role in how we talk about our adoption experience; both to our parents throughout our lives, and as adults to others. I’ve wanted to talk on this subject for a while, but worried, I couldn’t tease out a cohesive post explaining why I think it happens. This is my attempt to explain many of the different factors playing into it that I see around me. 

Read the rest of this entry »
 
11 Comments

Posted by on September 16, 2022 in Adoption

 

Tags: , , , , , ,

Missing Pieces

I think one of the hardest aspects to accept is knowing my missing pieces, will always be missing.

Where was I before I was adopted?

Did I stay in hospital the whole time?

Or was I moved to a foster home as I was told?

How was I treated, wherever I was?

Who cared for me?

Was I just left in a crib to cry it out?

Or was I given something to keep me quiet?

And if yes, is that why I cried non-stop for months if not held?

Why did the state not have a non-identifying report for me?

Why did the story given to mom and dad not match the story my aunt told me decades later?

Why does it all matter so much to me many decades later now that I’m on the downhill side of life?

 
4 Comments

Posted by on September 12, 2022 in Adoption, Ethics

 

Tags: , , , , , , ,

AP’s need to be educated before they adopt.

Yesterday, my old post on “The Chosen Child” showed up in the stats, a post from way back in 2011, one that was a 5 video series from the 1960’s in NY on adoption and adopting that I’d found on YouTube. YouTube isn’t a place I go to except for music, but thought maybe there were videos worth sharing. So I went to look and landed on a page with a video by an Adoptive Mother about 5 Things She Didn’t Know About Adoption before she’d adopted that she wanted to share. She seemed pleasant enough, so I sat through her discussing the 5 things she’d wished she’d known before adopting. Below isn’t what she said, just my scribbled one-liners of each point she talked about. I’m not linking to it as it appears she’s written a book all about it, which seems to be the reason for the video…

Read the rest of this entry »
 
1 Comment

Posted by on September 4, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

From 2019 and 2021: I know an adoptee who is just fine being adopted….

Two posts, two years apart, similar and different, or both/and, both with the same title.

2019 post here

2021 post here

It’s odd I titled both posts the same, I don’t think I realized it until I decided to do this post, it’s also not odd because my brain glitches more than I like.

Cheers

 
1 Comment

Posted by on September 4, 2022 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

Tags: , , , , , , , ,