What happens now?

This year is taking a toll on my carefully controlled emotions.  I’ve never been one that shared with family more than surface level emotions about anything that’s taken place in my life, if I even shared that something happened. Up to now, showing the depth of my feelings would have been risky, made me vulnerable, and when I feel vulnerable, I leave, first.  It’s always been safer not to share, and just be the one who makes sure everyone else is comfortable and happy.