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Tag Archives: mothers

Shaming and adoption…

Most connected to adoption know that white mothers from the BSE (1947-1973) were shamed for being unwed and pregnant.  That, community knowledge of the pregnancy brought shame down upon the entire family, and why, mothers were often sent away to maternity homes, or to relatives elsewhere, until after the birth and surrender of their baby for adoption. Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on June 30, 2016 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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Apparently, I wasn’t happy…

Although I haven’t shared my adoption story here, and likely won’t ever, I have shared parts in other places, and perhaps even here that I wasn’t happy when I came home.  The reality was that for months on end, I screamed unless I was sleeping, or being rocked which helped in the moment, but one other action made me calm…

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Posted by on September 12, 2015 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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Teen years…

Lori has good post up today that’s well worth reading about Dear Abby.  It’s also a very timely post, as last night I was thinking about how confusing it was to be an adoptee at that age.  Specifically, early teens, and how I reacted while trying to define my identity, it was not a wonderful time, to put it mildly.

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Posted by on May 17, 2015 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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Reunion stories and feelings of loss

An adoption reunion story generally creates comments that run the gamut…

  • so happy for you,
  • how sweet,
  • warnings about not liking what you find,
  • the grass isn’t always greener,
  • not all reunions work out.
  • how do your parents feel about you finding your birth parents,
  • don’t forget who your real parents are.

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Posted by on April 15, 2015 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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She’s a mom…

I just read this post The Most Powerful Thing You Can Say to Another Mom and while reading it, all I could think of was how mom reacted each time she thought about any of our mothers loosing us.  Her face crumbled in anguish and tears would stream down at just the thought of what our mothers went through.  So many years later, that is her same reaction.

Yes, mom is a mom…

Have a safe weekend…

 
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Posted by on February 7, 2015 in Adoption

 

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Being abandoned…

Last Sunday, we watched 60 Minutes and one of the segments was called “Alive and Kicking”.  A beautiful segment filled with an array of amazing voices and emotional stories.  Please take the time to watch it if you didn’t, you won’t regret it.  There was one specific part of that segment I can’t get out of my mind…

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Posted by on January 7, 2015 in Adoption

 

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Two-way flow…

By TAO

I’ve known for years that the US is both a sending and receiving country in Inter-county Adoption.  That Canadians adopted infants through domestic adoption and from foster care.  I also knew that Ireland adopted from the US as well off and on over the years.  It bothered me, but the numbers were miniscule, and Canadian and Irish babies had previously been adopted into the US in great numbers and with other things happening in adoption, I put it off to the side.

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Posted by on July 7, 2014 in Adoption

 

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Add another country to the list…

By TAO

Well, it’s time to add another country to the growing list of countries with the unsavory history of cases where mothers did not choose adoption, but adoption was allegedly chosen for their babies… Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on May 16, 2014 in Adoption

 

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Wishing peace, again…

By TAO

Words aren’t coming easy today, for one, I am not a fan of any commercialized holiday – whether it is Christmas, Valentines Day, or Mother’s Day.  Mother’s Day has been hard for me for several reasons in the last few decades – but since my search ended with a grave, it has been harder than before.   Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on May 11, 2014 in Adoption

 

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I obviously didn’t get that memo…

Apparently, times have changed and no one sent me the memo…that the statement below is hurtful and ignorant…according to those on Adoption: Share the Love Facebook page.

“Adoption is a great option…but only in cases where there are no capable and willing biological parents.”

What I take from that, is that if that saying is hurtful, or ignorant, some actually think it’s perfectly fine to give your baby away…even though you are capable (ability and means to raise a baby) and willing (want to parent to that child)…

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Posted by on May 8, 2014 in Adoption, adoptive parents, biological child

 

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It’s time for change…

By TAO

Magnolia with rain dropsMy search was done via a Confidential Intermediary (also called a CI).  That was never the way I had imagined my search going throughout the years, but I couldn’t physically search, nor was my brain competent enough to do it either.  So, I was left with putting my search in the hands of strangers – not something I would have chosen before, but at the time, I felt I had no choice because it was important to share with them what happened to me, just in case, it could protect them. Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on May 4, 2014 in Adoption, adoptive parents

 

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Cut the umbilical cord…

By TAO

Every adoption story whether it’s an adoption that goes through, or a contested adoption, seems to need to include details about who “cut the umbilical cord”.  Almost as if it grants automatic rights of some sort.  It has even worked its way into court cases, transcripts, and rulings for some reason I can’t fathom.  Something that seems to be held out as proof that the baby was meant to be theirs and the bond they have.

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Posted by on April 24, 2014 in Adoption, adoptive parents, biological child

 

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