Adoptees who publicly support Roe targeted by anti-abortion activists: ‘What if you were aborted?’
Take the time to read the full article above and then we can talk about it. Personally, I’ve never met an adoptee who hasn’t been schooled on how grateful they should be to be adopted; how lucky they are because they could have been aborted, yada yada yada. You’d think by now that society would recognize the harm caused by growing up under that umbrella of should be dictates, and even as an adult, still being treated like children by random strangers once they know you’re adopted, or even worse, challenged by Adoptive Parents and wanna be Adoptive Parents…
Someone linked to this FB post about a baby left at an apartment building in Idaho, police were called by the person who saw the baby, baby is healthy and was just born. The comments are a mix of support and anger as you would expect there to be, until, that is, a HAP pipes up that they are approved and would love to adopt that baby. Guys, that’s not just being an opportunist, it says you don’t give a hot damn about the mother of the baby, or the baby itself that you just put your hand up for. You also have no idea what the story is yet because the police were just called to the scene, you don’t even know if the mother is okay, or had any part in what happened. Despite not knowing anything – you called Dibs. Ugh, just ugh, and folks wonder why adoptive parents get a bad rap…
Post from the blog in 2014, Expectations of gratitude note there is a link inside the post doesn’t exist anymore but you can get the gist of what that link was anyway. I’m linking this because I think some in the adoption community will be all too happy to go back to acting like they did almost a decade ago and before.
July 10, 2022 at 7:00 pm
Until people understand that adoption is not totally benign for the child or the birth mother, they will continue to see adoption as the “best” solution for all. It is imperative that we continue to lobby for education and awareness about adoption complexity, grief and loss and to eliminate the fairytale of adoption as a win/win/win.
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July 10, 2022 at 7:54 pm
So agree with you. I thought people were becoming aware, but then, I step out of my comfort zone and get my hopes dashed.
July 13, 2022 at 1:17 pm
Whew, I’ve been terribly dashed lately. Thanks for sharing this article, I needed a bit of that, helps to build up the hope. I really like hope LOL
Seeing younger adult adoptees speak on it all so well is simply a wonderful thing to me. It truly is. It makes me happy to think that all of that effort by adoptees and others online for the last couple of decades+ has helped many find the words and language that so many of us have been trying to put together for so long. At the very least, it helps me believe none have wasted their time sharing their stories, beliefs and ideas, often while dodging rocks. I hope they take it all even further down the trail. Just like my kids have done with the things and ideas I’ve shared with them. Things that they have now taken to further heights than I ever could have dreamed possible.
I appreciated how she said everything, this paragraph really sums up the climate of today for me.
“I feel like I’ve been practicing for this moment. I’ve been exercising what it means to tell my story in spaces that are not necessarily safe for several years,” Drenka said. “But we know that adoptees … are typically in spaces where we feel like we don’t belong or nobody understands. So I will continue to work to share my story if it just reaches one of them.”
Sending all my power for hope 🎄 telepathically to Drenka and Wu today 💜 they’re gonna need it.
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July 27, 2022 at 4:05 pm
I’ve noticed how well so many adoptees deal with all the “what-ifs” in life. I tried to explain to some why that may be. Wasn’t as easy as I thought! I feel like my words aren’t as good as they could be.