There’s a heaviness to everything right now that weaves itself into every aspect of my life. A heaviness I haven’t felt for years. There are times when I find myself just sitting in my chair and watch my thoughts shuffle through my mind, none sticking, rather, they are gone the instant my mind randomly shuffles to the next thought. All I know is this isn’t my normal, my normal is boringly normal, not heavy, not carrying a level of fear like it is now, I haven’t had this level of fear simmering just below the surface of every waking moment since I had my health events.
Now that same type of fear underlies everything I do, or think.
So I try to distract myself when I get to that place where I recognize it happening; I play with the cat, laugh at the squirrels, songbirds and crows that visit my yard. And it helps, not as much as going out and playing in the garden does, but winter is here and I’m not keen on playing in the rain, but I must start doing something.
And I live a relatively privileged life and I’m struggling, imagine how other’s are faring.
This pandemic has also shown that there are many of us have not evolved enough to care to talk about the hard issues facing societies across the globe, let alone in the community we live in. Instead, we are wrapped up in me, me, me and what I want. Heaven help us, we can’t even collectively agree to wear masks, social distance and practice necessary hygienic protocols to protect each other and stay home. Let alone look at where and who we are letting down in society that desperately needed help before; because that might mean we won’t get what we want when we want it.
And seeing as this is a blog about adoption and being adopted, I have to ask – have we failed to have a Come to Jesus in that area as well. Adoption agencies are still promoting adoption as the best choice ever, talking about the covid-19 protocols they have in place, business as usual albeit some delays. I haven’t seen one adoption agency that has a post on making such a life-changing decision in the midst of a global pandemic may not be in anyone’s best interest. I get that there is a ticking clock on a pregnancy and mother’s choosing adoption because they can’t see any other option, but surely, with the sheer number of churches supporting adoption combined with the agencies that applied for and received government aid – someone could rally the churches to get their members to step into the need and provide a safe place for mother and babe to weather this storm.
Has anyone seen churches step up in this area and seek to help a struggling soon to be mother (or mother) to have a safe place to get through this, if you’ve seen it, drop a link in the comments. Same with any agencies that are cautioning mothers that making life-altering decisions right now might not be a good idea.
Apologies for too many run-on sentences.