Since I came on-line I’ve read countless comments by adoptive parents who don’t want their child defined by adoption and being adopted (oh the horrors). Positive Adoption Language supports that being defined by being adopted is a very bad thing with Is Adopted being bad and Was Adopted being good or positive, it was just an event after all.
So let’s say all that is true (it really isn’t) but let’s pretend being adopted is once and done and we can go through life being just regular folk, except that we really can’t thanks to adoption, adoptive parents and adoption agencies who like to hold up all those famous adoptees as proof that adoption is good.
So how do they square ‘was adopted’ but promote still famous adoptees?
Why do I bring this up? Because I’m sifting through a mega-list of adoptees being promoted on an adoption site, names I’m familiar with, some I’m not, some that are indeed adopted, some who aren’t, but hey, who needs accuracy. One day I’ll have gone through the entire list and will post it like the last time.
In the meantime one of the lessons I’ve learned in life is that you can’t have something both ways and if it is ‘was adopted’ then you need to stop posting those famous adoptee lists.
Or you could simply recognise that we were adopted (legal event) and we will always be adopted (life) and give up the silliness of trying to pretend being adopted isn’t part of what makes us who we are, the same as everything else in our life. I promise it’s far more comfortable accepting all that makes you, you, than pretending we are just like other people who were raised in their biological families are, we aren’t, we have two sets of parents, biological and adoptive – make peace with that, it’s really not that hard.
Sorry for dropping off the face of the earth – what’s up with you?