I know I’m always talking about how you adopt matters, I’m hoping that today’s post offers you a chance to consider how the long-term impact your choices in adopting can play out and even be generational. Choosing the way to get that baby fastest, easiest, the shortest time post birth to relinquishment, or no revocation period, shouldn’t be what guides the choices you make, your ethics and morals should.
The generational effect of the adoption can reverberate down the generations, how they view it, feel about it, feel about your role in the adoption and choices you made.
Will you research and learn about adoption and then research the agency/lawyer to decide if their morals match yours. Will you learn about all the ugly that can happen in adoption (today) so you know what to look out for so you can make decisions that follow your morals when you know something isn’t right. Will you just go with the flow even though you wouldn’t want your daughter treated that way, or will you insist that treatment wasn’t acceptable, despite the fact it may mean you don’t adopt. Your legacy will be based on how your child’s adoption story plays out. It’s on you to plot the road to an adoption that you will be proud to tell in detail to your child, including the ethics the agency or lawyer had and how that came into play.
I can’t imagine anyone would want the following to be part of their legacy but I’m hoping you get why even a glimmer of bad can taint your adoption and will make doing it right a priority in how you adopt.
Possibly the most well known highly unethical adoptions were ones facilitated by Georgia Tann – each succeeding generation of those adopted through her will bear the legacy that their mother, father, grandmother, grandfather, ancestor was a product of that legacy. The story of Georgia Tann is not an isolated case nor an anomaly even today. Take the time to listen and/or read about Georgia, the stories of the ones involved and then remember there’s possibly 5,000 stories out there with this legacy. Consider the generational impact that is still ever present and will be for generations to come.
I’d invite you to listen to this podcast Southern Hollows Podcast – Episode Two “Routine Papers” about the story of Georgia Tann.
Then I’d invite you to read:
Legacy of Devy Bruch: Her life as a stolen baby Devy also wrote a book titled: The Complete Story: No Mama, I Didn’t Die: My Life as a Stolen Baby
Theresa Jennings story, she might have been one of the babies that Georgia didn’t bother to take care of as she didn’t think she’d be marketable – if her parents hadn’t insisted on seeing the baby who was crying in the background.
Alma Sipple’s story of what happened to her when Georgia came to her home to her eventual reunion with her daughter.
Lisa Wingate recently wrote a book called “Before We Were Yours” that is a fictional story based on the many stories that happened due to Georgia Tann. You can read about it here and it has links to purchase the book on the side.
I highly recommend Barbara Bisantz Raymond’s The Baby Thief: The Untold Story of Georgia Tann, the Baby Seller Who Corrupted Adoption.