And I think an open thread might be a good idea for those who just want a space to chat, whether it’s about the holidays past or present, or you just want to hang out with friends who get it. Talk about joy, sadness, hope, memories, favorite movies, what you’re doing, things that went right this year, even if you’re just feeling Bah Humbug or want to just say Hi and Merry Christmas to all.
Feel free to post a link you think others would enjoy reading, or should be part of the end of the year post. Just remember to be kind because holidays can be really hard, and no one needs an extra heaping of stress laid on them here.
*********
When I was at the very end of dealing with mom’s possessions and had found the Christmas family candle holders I wanted to keep, I found this brandy-snifter with the plastic elves. It was a token gift from the drug store down the road 
when I was maybe six? Some years it sat on the corner of the piano, other years the mantle, the coffee table, atop the TV, but it was part of the decorations every Christmas. Can’t remember what I thought of it as a kid, later I saw the irony of an over-size brandy snifter being front and center in a home that was against consuming alcohol whatsoever. But I brought it home because not only did it show up every Christmas, it was one of the few decorations mom kept when she downsized to her home in the retirement community, so it meant something to her. It’s funny what triggers memories, I think this triggered happy memories for mom.
Whatever you celebrate – I wish you peace, love, good cheer and safety.
The adopted ones blog 
cb
December 23, 2017 at 7:05 pm
Merry Christmas to all!.
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TAO
December 24, 2017 at 12:15 am
And to you and yours. Just put the two gifts (count them two) I’m giving this year – one to hubby, engraved key-chain celebrating his new to him car and a couple scratchies. The other for his friend, chocolate Icy squares he loves and a subway gift care – last of the imaginative gift-givers but I know he loves both…
Have a good, if not quick visit with the relatives.
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beth62
December 27, 2017 at 9:48 pm
Twas a couple days after christmas….
Merry Christmas my friends 🎅 I’ve missed you!!! Cheers!
Home again finally, got a new tiny tablet and the keyboard works, yay. Have been traveling in read only mode, when a signal could be found, long enough to just give up on the internet stuff for a while. It’s been kinda nice and peaceful tho 🙂 I can’t seem to keep up with everything and everybody lately, arrgg. Didn’t help that my litterbug buddy G couldn’t take it anymore and grabbed and threw my phone right out of his plane window into an Everglades swamp, forever. I confess, I couldn’t take it anymore either, I barely even flinched, we both busted out laughing and had the best time for weeks after that. The amount of stress that went out of the window with it was astonishing. Feel like I’ve been transported back to the 1970’s freedom, except I got a old flip phone for emergencies but only a few have my number, the ones that know better than to call me before figuring it out on their own. Everyone else has managed to manage without my input. How you may ask? They say it’s some kind of crazy voodoo magic 🙂
But, I have been able to keep up on reading here, thank goodness for here! I’m fairly certain I would not fare so well during my days if I didn’t know here was, here.
TAO, I do very much appreciate you and what you do here. And everyone else that joins in to find wisdom and peace just makes it very filling, like a good hot meal. Even when, especially when that meal is a steaming bowl of beets. I don’t feel so alone when I’m out roaming this big world of ours trying to keep up with life. I know I am not alone in feeling that way. I’ve also learned recently that many of my guys have been reading here for years, every word! Including my buddy G, haha. They even talked about stuff we said together, and left me out!! He confessed at first it was for snooping and spying on me, then said he started learning really new and good stuff, it helped him help the other lost ones, and didn’t pay much mind to me after that. Thank you for teaching my ancient, aggravating, bossy, hard headed, stinky and god-awful-ugly buddy something, hell, anything! You deserve some kind of official award, for real, it’s a rare thing. You’ve certainly made the Hall of Fame at my home for that one!! He’s used the knowledge well, know that, we have more than enough proof to be proud about here, just don’t tell him that 😜
While I was out and about I’d run across something in my day and want to come here and tell and talk about it, and the funniest thing happened, several times, you had written about something in the same grain, if not the exact subject I was exploring or dealing with. We’ve been on the same page and the timing was shocking and very interesting to me. Thank You.
Whew. Have been wanting/waiting to tell you that for weeks 🙂 Now I hope I can remember some of the responses I wanted to type at the time…
I’m just happy I’ve survived yet another magical Christmas – that’s where I am with it this year 🙂
“Live” Doll? Hell Yeah!!
So, Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Happy New Year!
A reminder in case it helps anyone, at least in the northern hemisphere anyway, our darkest days of the year are behind us, every day is going to get brighter now my friends 🌞 adopted or not!
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TAO
December 30, 2017 at 4:00 pm
Beth – I just found this comment in the spam file – no idea why it went there (think it was this comment – one of them did).
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beth62
December 27, 2017 at 9:55 pm
Twas a couple days after christmas….
Merry Christmas my friends 🎅 I’ve missed you!!! Cheers!
Home again finally, got a new tiny tablet and the keyboard works, yay. Have been traveling in read only mode, when a signal could be found, long enough to just give up on the internet stuff for a while. It’s been kinda nice and peaceful tho 🙂 I can’t seem to keep up with everything and everybody lately, arrgg. Didn’t help that my litterbug buddy G couldn’t take it anymore and grabbed and threw my phone right out of his plane window into an Everglades swamp, forever. I confess, I couldn’t take it anymore either, I barely even flinched, we both busted out laughing and had the best time for weeks after that. The amount of stress that went out of the window with it was astonishing. Feel like I’ve been transported back to the 1970’s freedom, except I got an old flip phone for emergencies but only a few have my number, the ones that know better than to call me before figuring it out on their own. Everyone else has managed to manage without my input. How you may ask? They say it’s some kind of crazy voodoo magic 🙂
But, I have been able to keep up on reading here, thank goodness for here! I’m fairly certain I would not fare so well during my days if I didn’t know here was, here.
TAO, I do very much appreciate you and what you do here. And everyone else that joins in to find wisdom and peace just makes it very filling, like a good hot meal. Even when, especially when that meal is a steaming bowl of beets. I don’t feel so alone when I’m out roaming this big world of ours trying to keep up with life. I know I am not alone in feeling that way. I’ve also learned recently that many of my guys have been reading here for years, every word! Including my buddy G, haha. They even talked about stuff we said together, and left me out!! He confessed at first it was for snooping and spying on me, then said he started learning really new and good stuff, it helped him help the other lost ones, and didn’t pay much mind to me after that. Thank you for teaching my ancient, aggravating, bossy, hard headed, stinky and god-awful-ugly buddy something, hell, anything! You deserve some kind of official award, for real, it’s a rare thing. They don’t come any harder than that one. You’ve certainly made the Hall of Fame at my home for that one!! He’s used the knowledge well, know that, we have more than enough proof to be proud about here, just don’t tell him that 😜
While I was out and about I’d run across something in my day and want to come here and tell and talk about it, and the funniest thing happened, several times, you had written about something in the same grain, if not the exact subject I was exploring or dealing with. We’ve been on the same page and the timing was shocking and very interesting to me. Thank You.
Whew. Have been wanting/waiting to tell you that for weeks 🙂 Now I hope I can remember some of the responses I wanted to type at the time…
I’m just happy I’ve survived yet another magical Christmas – that’s where I am with it this year 🙂
“Live” Doll? Hell Yeah!!
So, Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Happy New Year!
A reminder in case it helps anyone, at least in the northern hemisphere anyway, our darkest days of the year are behind us, every day is going to get brighter now my friends 🌞 adopted or not!
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TAO
December 27, 2017 at 10:04 pm
I missed you too Beth – and tell G it’s time he started talking here (hi G). You literally made my day Beth, I’d been getting worried cuz you just disappeared and I didn’t know if I’d offended you, if you were okay, or just off doing your thing – glad to know it was the latter. Cheers! And yes, I thought about the “Live” Doll – but you were missing, so…
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beth62
December 28, 2017 at 1:45 am
I missed you, and apologize for not getting in touch. I did run off for a bit of a walk with the wounded and then it all sort of snowballed from there.
Good snowballs tho! I’ve learned that the good ones are just as heavy as the bad ones sometimes 🙂 Gotta love snow balls lol The big ones sure can carry you to new places. It’s back to business for me now, have a big year ahead.
I invited them all, we’ll see. G says he ain’t proper enough to converse with the kind smart ladies that talk here. lol I have to agree.
I know he’s worried I’ll go to farmers.com and talk to all his women if he makes any noise here haha
He probably should be either way 😈,
He’s run off again to continue his house rebuilding\visiting his old friends tour, or as I called it when I was being drug around – the dirty old men hugging tour. omg.
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TAO
December 28, 2017 at 3:39 am
Tell him my first husband was a long-distance trucker and I travelled with him so there isn’t much I haven’t heard – but I learned a lot and found out there’s wisdom everywhere, doesn’t matter the words used, what matters is the intent.
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beth62
December 28, 2017 at 1:57 am
I’m trying to imagine a time when you’ve ever offended me, or how you could, and I’m just not coming up with anything. And if it did happen I can only imagine we’d just talk about it easily, and completely, haha, then move on to more fun stuff 🙂
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TAO
December 28, 2017 at 3:40 am
True enough…you were on my mind though.
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cb
December 29, 2017 at 9:58 pm
Hey Beth, glad to see you back on here!
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beth62
December 30, 2017 at 2:28 pm
Hey (((cb)))
Hope you are getting on well and ready for a new year. Good to see you. How’s the weather over there? Really cold here, I’m staying by the woodstove today in my cozy PJs if I can get away with it.
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cb
December 31, 2017 at 2:52 pm
Weather is high 20s (Celsius), quite humid but with a nice breeze offsetting that. New Year has now arrived here! I better go to bed though (I just hope the neighbours keep the noise down)
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Heather
December 23, 2017 at 11:57 pm
I have a hard time at this time of year. I’m a pretty isolated and lonely person and it gets worse in the wintertime yet I try not to wish my life away waiting for these days to be over.
I hope it’s a happy positive time for everyone else.
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TAO
December 24, 2017 at 12:12 am
Wintertime is really hard, harder when you’re isolated – I’m so glad for the internet, the friends made (like you) and everyone else. You are always welcome here – others will be here too. Raising my fresh brewed cup of coffee in cheers to you!
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Heather
December 24, 2017 at 9:26 am
Thank you TAO. I have learned so much from your sharing here. Thank you for including me.
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pj
December 24, 2017 at 6:27 pm
Fond memories of Christmas growing up. Every year we traveled around our tiny state delivering envelopes with 2$ for each relative. At 94 and with some dementia, a-dad still loves continuing our tradition, minus the travel. He’d been asking me to help him since before Thanksgiving. I prepared the envelopes and after dad signed all, he commented about the number of relative’s “birthdays” in December. He makes me laugh !
As I approach my sixth decade, I finally feel mostly at peace. This week I received a Christmas card from birth sis signed, ” your half-sis”.Finally, that feeling of true connection. It means so much to us adopotees….
Love and peace to all.. and with much gratitude to Tao for this blog.
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TAO
December 24, 2017 at 6:53 pm
What a sweet tradition – glad you are still continuing it. Traditions are good, they create the ties that stick, I hope people don’t forget that in this busy world. Yeah for feeling connected to – wishing you joy.
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TAO
December 24, 2017 at 6:55 pm
It’s a good medium long read – timely for the season and what’s been happening this year.
https://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/national/compassion-deficit-human-nature-change/article37423670/?utm_medium=Referrer:+Social+Network+/+Media&utm_campaign=Shared+Web+Article+Links
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legitimatebastard
December 25, 2017 at 12:46 am
Many memories from childhood… hunting for Christmas trees in a forest. Yes, my ADad, AMom and friends and I drove to a farm with a forest. We searched for the perfect tree. ADad chopped it down and we carried it back, or dragged it back, to the car where he tied up on the car roof. Back at the tree farmer’s lodge, we drank hot chocolate and ate sandwiches.
We’d share dinner on Christmas Eve with my foster brother, his mom and his ADad. My foster brother was 9 years older than I was, we never lived together, but were raised together. Our parents were very close after he went back to live with his mother and new adoptive father. We gathered around the TV to watch How the Grinch Stole Christmas and Snoopy’s Christmas.
But, who am I kidding? Fleeting memories are mixed with sadness when I think of the reality lurking behind my childhood. I sat on Santa’s lap, alone. Meanwhile, my siblings grew up together. I grew up an only child. When we were reunited in March 1974, they told me, and our father told me, that our mother went into the hospital two days after Christmas in 1955. She was very sick. She gave birth to me two weeks later and died a few months later.
I am numb with sadness. It is all too unreal.
And they think I had the better life. A happy childhood …until I realized they lived just 6 miles away from me the whole time.
I’m sorry to bring down the mood. My memories don’t match the rest of the story of all the details in my life. And the loss of my – our – mother.
And yes, all four off my parents are now gone. I miss them all.
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TAO
December 25, 2017 at 5:39 pm
There is always loss woven into adoption – how could there not be? Good memories of times past can also stand alone and bring warm feelings flooding back. The older I get the more everything seems a mix of both.
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Dannie
January 4, 2018 at 8:38 pm
I’ve been just catching up. So many things, so many good memories, but some split this season as my great uncle passed away. He was 100 so a life well lived, but of course that meant that half our family here was in Florida for some or all of the holidays.
WE made the traditional memories, cookies, sleeping by the christmas tree Christmas eve, watching polar express etc….it was very beautiful. I’m hoping to have a bit more time to read again online and real books but was working online in addition to my day job due to husband losing his job in October, but he now is starting 2 jobs (full time and an extra part time) within the next week so new beginnings are wonderful.
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TAO
January 4, 2018 at 9:26 pm
Oh wow – didn’t realize he was out of work – it’s really hard when that happens and stress goes overtime – glad to here it was for a short time. Best for this year!
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