Wanting to adopt a child in need

I can’t tell you how many posts and articles I’ve read over the years talking about adopting because all children need families.  That adoption has always been part of the plan, or has been laid on their hearts.  That giving a home to a child in need is what they’ve always wanted to do since they were young, and that adopting now is the plan seeing as your quest to have one of your own didn’t work. (fair warning this isn’t warm and fuzzy)

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Dear Adoption.com Columnist

I read your article posted a few days ago: 3 Reasons To NOT Find Your Birth Parents with the tag line “It’s your life; it’s your choice.” and just wanted to lay out some statements of facts before getting into a nuanced rebuttal.

• You are an adoptive parent
• You have written another ‘instructive’ article to adoptees before (title below)
• You are not an adoptee, at least you don’t claim to be

 

From the 2012 archives: The Things People Say prompt…

This post was part of a daily adoptee blogging prompt for National Adoption Month 2012, the prompt did nothing for me so I went with an alternative: The Things People Say

None of the questions are speaking to me, but the Things People Say prompt is, so going off script again, so to speak.  What I would like to talk about are the positive adoption statements made today that are so hard and fast that they deny any other reality.  Those statements are bringing back and/or continuing the stereotypical comments told to adoptees repeatedly throughout their lives.

 

The difference between…

Sharing your perspective based on your life experience and being a know-it-all-bitch.  Where is that line in conversations between groups in adoption and within groups?

 

Wondering if anyone is like me…

I’ve wanted to write about this for a long time.  I’ve danced around it, alluded to it, but haven’t been able to talk about it directly. 

 

It was my mother’s birthday the other day…

Specifically, the birthday of my mother by birth.  The morning before, I had this thought that there was a birthday I was missing, but I had no idea whose, or even when, just that it was someone’s birthday soon, perhaps that day.  Seeing as I couldn’t figure it out I went to check my family trees to see if it was a direct line ancestor’s birthday.  I checked dad’s tree first because it’s the one I know best, nothing, so then I moved to my maternal birth family tree, and there it was, my mother’s birthday was the next day.

 

“Gotcha Day”

I’m used to the mishmash of terms used by some families who’ve adopted and celebrate the day.  It works for them, hopefully if they see it doesn’t work for their child they’ll stop.  Still detest the term “Gotcha Day” for many reasons that should be obvious.