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Just a quick update to a post from last June…

07 Dec

This post: Father’s Day it has enough links to get you up to speed.

This is the update: Father Could Be Granted Parental Rights After 8 Years

Edited: Sorry, guys I posted the wrong link in the update – it’s now fixed, thanks CB.

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25 Comments

Posted by on December 7, 2016 in Adoption

 

Tags: , , , ,

25 responses to “Just a quick update to a post from last June…

  1. Lara/Trace

    December 7, 2016 at 5:29 pm

    I simply cannot imagine what this dad is going thru but I ache for him.

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    • TAO

      December 7, 2016 at 5:30 pm

      Me too, at least he’s been able to create a relationship with his child over the years, on visits there and extended visits with him…

      Liked by 1 person

       
  2. shadowtheadoptee

    December 7, 2016 at 6:26 pm

    I, always, wonder what the child must be thinking, especially,as she is getting old enough to understand?

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    • TAO

      December 7, 2016 at 6:30 pm

      I wonder to Shadow. If memory serves he’s been in her life for 4 years now, including spending time in his home, so it’s not unknown. What happens in the future, who knows, but I know he’s said he is open to allowing visits etc. This never should have happened in the first place.

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  3. cb

    December 7, 2016 at 8:44 pm

    When I click on the above update, it links to an article from 2013.

    This is the latest one I can find:

    http://denver.cbslocal.com/2016/12/06/father-could-be-granted-parental-rights-after-8-years/#.WEeqqf8Svao.facebook

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    • TAO

      December 7, 2016 at 8:59 pm

      Thanks CB – brain glitch…

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  4. Dannie

    December 7, 2016 at 8:53 pm

    so sad a family is shattered by individuals not doing things the right way to begin with. It says the couple is the mother’s brother and SIL, so really a lot of this could have been avoided by being completely honest in the beginning about it. Now I can only assume family ties are strained

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    • TAO

      December 7, 2016 at 9:01 pm

      The mother intentionally acted, they were in court in Colorado before she went to Utah to give birth. The ruling from the Utah Supreme Court is in the Father’s Day post. He’s been put through the wringer…

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      • Dannie

        December 7, 2016 at 9:21 pm

        oh yes mother intentionally acted…..but that’s what I meant….maybe not clearly…..this could have been done in many different ways with everyone’s knowledge instead of this circus act.

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        • TAO

          December 7, 2016 at 9:28 pm

          Yes, she could have acted appropriately and let him raise his daughter. The paps could have said, hell no, I’m not willing to start an adoption where the parent is fit, capable, financially able and wants to raise his child. They all knew before she was born. It’s going to be traumatic now, it wouldn’t have been. But I’m glad he stood his ground. It’s one more cautionary tales to show people who try to ignore fathers…

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    • cb

      December 7, 2016 at 9:24 pm

      I believe that the Mormon church played a role in the above case too, i.e. the elders in the church encouraged the bmom to relinquish her child.

      The Mormon church does actively encourage unwed mothers to choose adoption:

      https://www.understandingmormonism.org/adoption

      a quote:
      ***.Regarding the matter of unplanned pregnancy, the leaders of the Mormon Church have continually stressed the importance of living chaste and virtuous lives and the importance of not having sexual relations outside of marriage. When unwed parents are either unwilling or unable to marry, the Mormon Church encourages that the child be placed for adoption, keeping in mind what is best for the child.

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      • shadowtheadoptee

        December 8, 2016 at 12:31 am

        TThe church encourages adoption, as opposed to what? Abortion, or keeping the child? Kind of vague aren’t they, or am I missing something in their statement?

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        • cb

          December 8, 2016 at 12:55 am

          As opposed to both, I think.

          The following are the 2002 and 1994 ensigns re adoption and the unwed mother:

          https://www.lds.org/ensign/2002/02/adoption-and-the-unwed-mother?lang=eng

          quote:

          “Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by parents who provide love, support, and all the blessings of the gospel.

          “Every effort should be made in helping those who conceive out of wedlock to establish an eternal family relationship. When the probability of a successful marriage is unlikely, unwed parents should be encouraged to place the child for adoption, preferably through LDS [Family] Services” (“Policies and Announcements,” Ensign, Apr. 1999, 80).

          also:

          https://www.lds.org/ensign/1994/09/guidance-for-unwed-parents?lang=eng

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          • shadowtheadoptee

            December 8, 2016 at 4:38 am

            Thanks. That explains it.

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            • beth62

              December 8, 2016 at 5:10 pm

              Yep, dang bastards ruin everything. So frightening to so many.

              🙂 Hey shadow!!! Very good to hear from you.

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              • shadowtheadoptee

                December 8, 2016 at 5:54 pm

                Hey, Beth! Good to see you still around. Yep, you said it.

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                • cb

                  December 9, 2016 at 1:14 am

                  How nice to see Shadow, Beth and TAO all comment on the same post – it is like old times!

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                  • beth62

                    December 10, 2016 at 3:51 pm

                    Very nice 🙂 I miss you all and hope everyone is doing well. Would love to hear what everyone is up to. We are preparing for a Christmas wedding! Even though I’m not wild about attaching anything else to the holiday season… I am too excited and happy anyway 🙂 My special grandbaby is getting a new and perfect daddy, and he is one of mine, so I am absolutley thrilled ! Along with extremely nervous LOL but it’s all good, really good.

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                  • shadowtheadoptee

                    December 11, 2016 at 3:03 am

                    Just raising goats, and playing music. That’s about it.

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                    • cb

                      December 11, 2016 at 11:19 am

                      Not doing much here either – having Christmas with family at my older nephew’s place (he is now a dad). I’ve moved further north than I used to live.

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                    • beth62

                      December 11, 2016 at 1:46 pm

                      that’s great, I’ll bet you are getting good after all this time playing. I will have to tell my buddy Bob about your goats. He is extremely Pro-Goat, always happy to hear about someone else having goats. Always worried that there aren’t enough goats, and goat lovers in the world and will be full of questions about what kind, how big, etc. etc. Will ask if you thank your goats, and will eventually ask if you are married or not haha He’s still looking for his dream goat girl… can’t seem to find one that doesn’t come between him and his goats… gotta love Bob. He made me the best pumpkin cheese cake in the world at thanksgiving. I hid and hoarded it for days until I ate the whole thing LOL He’s a pretty good catch, if you like goats, and cheese cake. He’s got plenty of goat money LOL Spread the word.

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                    • beth62

                      December 11, 2016 at 1:53 pm

                      (((cb))) I hope the move north was a good one. Do you like it there? The next generation has taken over the holidays for me now. It’s really nice 🙂 I didn’t even ask, they just took over and told me to go sit with the old people and watch the littles be cute! I don’t mind at all 🙂

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  5. shadowtheadoptee

    December 12, 2016 at 1:27 am

    Beth, well, tell him Boer’s, Spanish, and a mix of who knows what. Married, but, hmmm, goat money? If that status changes? I didn’t like the goats, at first. Sore I would never own them. I’ll sum it up by saying they grew on me. I have one, in particular, that would make a better dog than goat. Ellie is my girl. Stays by my side, lays at my feet, and in general I can’t budge without her help. Kinda partial to her.
    THe bucks, however, I can live without! Good Lord Almighty!!! Skunks don’t smell that bad. Tell your friend I said that. He will laugh for sure.

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    • beth62

      December 13, 2016 at 3:04 pm

      I will tell for sure LOL Will also tell him even the goat girls can’t take the smell of Bob!!!! There’s not enough goat money on the planet to put up with that smell!! I tell him all the time, as he stands outside, the ladies might put up with ugly, but you really need to find one whose smeller quit working 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

       
  6. cb

    December 14, 2016 at 11:24 am

    Like it very much, Beth, weather is awesome (can’t reply directly to your question for some reason)

    Like

     

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