Talk about the forever child…

13 Apr

Upfront, I know next to nothing about Nebraska’s adoption laws so feel free to correct my interpretation of how it plays out for an adoptee seeking info.  I’d be happy to be wrong…please read Shea’s comment that explains the different dates that apply, what changed – Thank you Shea…

An adoptee must be 25 years old before they can request information from the state.

It appears that birth parents can sign consent or non-consent forms about releasing info (or not) to the adoptee.  They can also revoke either form…

But it goes farther…

If no consent form has been signed, nor have any of the non-consent forms been signed, the state will do one of two things:

a) if they know the biological parent or parents on the original birth certificate has died, the info on original birth certificate is released. source

b) release to the one adopted; the court the adoption took place in, the adoption agency, and that the agency may help search for any birth relatives (and of course, the agency can and will charge the adoptee for the service).

If a birth parent non-consent form has been signed, it states that even after their death, the info can’t be released if they have a surviving spouse (that is not the biological parent of the person adopted) until they have also died. source

If a consent form has been signed by the birth parent(s) listed on the original birth certificate, the adoptee, sort of, has the right to their original birth certificate. source

But there’s one more potential roadblock…

The adopting parents can also sign a non-consent form so that the state will not release any information “…at no time prior to his or her death or the death of both parents if each signed the form may any information on the adopted person’s original birth certificate be released to such adopted person.” source

So even if the birth parents sign consents, or has passed away – the adoptive parents non-consent veto’s the consent or death and the one adopted is denied.

To read all the parts to the law – start here

No words, just no words…

I challenge non-adopted readers to think how you would feel if you were treated this way…








Posted by on April 13, 2016 in Adoption, adoptive parents


Tags: , ,

19 responses to “Talk about the forever child…

  1. Gregory Luce

    April 13, 2016 at 10:16 pm

    Holy crap. This one could be fun to do a flowchart to show how convoluted and insane it is, if not funny except that it’s an actual law. I can’t believe it includes a nonconsent for the life of the birth parent + the life of that birth parent’s spouse even if the spouse is not a birth parent. That’s nuts.


    • TAO

      April 13, 2016 at 10:20 pm

      So – did I describe it all correctly? It’s bizarre…


      • Gregory Luce

        April 13, 2016 at 10:39 pm

        I’m pretty sure you got it right. I’m actually going to flowchart it in a fun way that shows how crazy it is. I can barely follow the statute, actually, without breaking it down. What brought it to your attention?


        • TAO

          April 13, 2016 at 10:41 pm

          I saw a post on FB from last year that highlighted the adoptive parents rights to sign non-consent forms prohibiting any release of info before they died…

          If you create the flow-chart – comeback and link your post – if you’d be so kind…


          • Gregory Luce

            April 14, 2016 at 1:25 am

            Will do. There should be an actual annual prize or plaque given to the governor or legislature for the worst adoptee law in the country. I nominate this one so far. Are there any other states with an adoptive parent veto?


            • TAO

              April 14, 2016 at 3:03 am

              Not that I know of…but who knows – Missouri used to require permission from adoptive parents and if they’d passed I think it was too bad – I know they’ve changed the laws since.


            • Shea Grimm

              April 14, 2016 at 11:06 am

              As I mention below, the adoptive parent veto in Nebraska went away in 2002.

              Greg, Emm Paul, when she petitioned the court for her records in NY, was required by the judge to get permission from not only her adoptive parents, but her husband. She was 35.


              • Gregory Luce

                April 15, 2016 at 12:37 pm

                So, I’m going to print this out about Emm and paste it to my computer as a constant reminder of the insanity. Did she ultimately get the records?


  2. Heather

    April 13, 2016 at 10:43 pm

    What kind of person creates laws like this? What are they so afraid of?


    • TAO

      April 13, 2016 at 10:46 pm

      Who knows – convoluted doesn’t begin to explain it…good grief…


  3. Lara/Trace

    April 13, 2016 at 11:22 pm

    (palm to forehead) could it be any harder than that?


    • TAO

      April 14, 2016 at 12:11 am

      Don’t see how…


  4. eagoodlife

    April 14, 2016 at 8:05 am

    Speechless!! Built on fear and need for control.


  5. Shea Grimm

    April 14, 2016 at 11:04 am

    So, I’m a Nebraska adoptee and a longtime adoptee equality activist. you’re missing several pieces of the (admittedly, ridiculously confusing) puzzle.

    Here’s how it works:

    If relinquishment or consent to adoption was given prior to 9/1/88, an adult adoptee (25) can file a written request for his or her original birth certificate (OBC). The Department of Health & Human Services shall release the OBC if the birth mother, if unmarried at the adoptee’s birth, or both birth parents have signed a consent form (relative means biological parents or siblings) and the adoptive parents have not filed a non-consent form.

    If there is no consent or non-consent form on file, the department may only release information regarding the court where the decree was issued and the adoption agency, if any, involved.

    The department shall also release the OBC if the department has information that both biological parents are deceased, or if only one biological parent is known and that person is deceased and no non-consent form has been filed by an adoptive parent.

    If relinquishment or consent to adoption was given after 8/31/88 and before 7/20/02, an adult adoptee (21) can file a request for his or her OBC. For relinquishments and consents after 8/31/88, the birth parent consent form is no longer required. Consent is assumed given unless a non-consent is on file. The department shall release the OBC if no non-consent form has been filed by either a birth or adoptive parent. If a birth parent non-consent form is on file, then the department shall only release medical history.

    The department shall also release the OBC if the department has information that both biological parents are deceased, or if only one biological parent is known and that person is deceased unless an adoptive parent has filed a non-consent form. The department shall establish a policy for verifying information regarding the death of the biological parent or parents.

    If relinquishment or consent to adoption was given after 7/20/02, adoptive parents are no longer given the option of filing a non-consent form. The OBC is released unless a birth parent has filed a non-consent.


    • TAO

      April 14, 2016 at 1:17 pm

      Thanks Shea the consent went away in 2002 but to me it didn’t read as if it was retroactive – just adoptions after that date – am I correct?


  6. Karen whitaker

    April 15, 2016 at 6:54 pm

    The law is obsurd in my opinion. When an adoptee is 18 years or older, they should have all legal rights to their birth certificate. Every case, every state. Shame and guilt belongs to the one who carries those emotions, but when we use shame and guilt to commit secrets and lies, that is another story especially at the expense involving another human being. Avoiding the truth does not make it any less true. I would rather live in truth here on earth and be judged by man than live in secrets and lies on earth and be judged by God.


  7. Mimi

    April 18, 2016 at 2:10 am

    This makes my head hurt, so I cannot even imagine for those that are impacted by this law how this makes their heart hurt. As an adoptive parent, the idea that I have/had the right to stop my child from obtaining information about their birth parents is so absurd, so controlling, so absolutely, mind-numbingly wrong that I can’t even understand the thought process behind it. I’m so sorry that adoptees continue to have to fight for basic information about themselves.


    • TAO

      April 18, 2016 at 3:03 am

      Mimi – thank you so very much…



Tell me your thoughts, but please be nice...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: