Wishing peace, again…
By TAO
Words aren’t coming easy today, for one, I am not a fan of any commercialized holiday – whether it is Christmas, Valentines Day, or Mother’s Day. Mother’s Day has been hard for me for several reasons in the last few decades – but since my search ended with a grave, it has been harder than before.
Yesterday, I was reading “Confessions of an Adoptee“, a series of mainly short sticky note posts with a few longer posts mixed in from many different adoptee voices. Confession #37 struck me very hard, not just for myself, but so many other adoptees too. Many of these Confessions seem to be from adoptees from China, that tells me that despite the words of bravado being voiced by prospective and adoptive parents of today about how much has changed, how they know better today, the adoptees just coming of age, tell me things are just the same.
Take the time to read through the many Confessions on the site or Facebook page – the same feelings some of us old-timers feel, or have felt at different times in the past, are still being woven into the words of the young adult adoptees of today. Adoption will never be just a simple swap of a child from one family to another…I don’t know if there will ever come a day when adoptees won’t have to work through these feelings…
Wishing everyone a day of peace…
Tags: adoptee, adoptees, adoption, adoption impact, adoptive family, biological family, mothers, stories
The adopted ones blog 
mad momma moogacat
May 11, 2014 at 5:04 pm
Sending you love today, TAO.
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cb
May 11, 2014 at 9:14 pm
Will also be thinking of you on this diffiult day.
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eagoodlife
May 11, 2014 at 10:08 pm
I hope you had a day of peace too TAO.I got through the day well, my family made sure of it and did all the right things. I wore the rings of my mothers, grandmother and it wasn’t until this morning I realised the one who had most been mother to me was not represented – how sad! Somehow typical of an adoptee’s life!
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TAO
May 11, 2014 at 10:18 pm
Thanks guys…I cleaned up one of the flowerbeds in the front. Nothing finer to banish the blues than playing in the dirt and enjoying the flowers…
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Andrew H
May 11, 2014 at 10:46 pm
Hi Tao
Mother’s day is a tricky day for us adoptees, welll I should speak for myself I guess. Is my real mother thinking of me? Where is she or is she still alive at all? The conflicts can be unsettling as ‘normal people’ enjoy with their mums but for me (although grateful to my adoptive parents) I being adopted at nearly 8 years old, have a conscious memory of my real mother.
I agree with TAO, gardening is very therapeutic (as is TaiChi) or music too!
Day by day fellow adoptees!
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TAO
May 11, 2014 at 10:48 pm
Glad to hear you chiming in…I second music – don’t do TaiChi…
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Valentine Logar
May 12, 2014 at 2:08 pm
I am fortunate. Yesterday, I was able to consider all three of the mothers, their contributions and the relationships I have had and continue to have with my First.
I am sorry for the difficulty of yesterday Tao. I do hope over time you are able to find more peace.
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