Every adoption story whether it’s an adoption that goes through, or a contested adoption, seems to need to include details about who “cut the umbilical cord”. Almost as if it grants automatic rights of some sort. It has even worked its way into court cases, transcripts, and rulings for some reason I can’t fathom. Something that seems to be held out as proof that the baby was meant to be theirs and the bond they have.
All babies delivered have their cords cut when they are born. It isn’t anything special that I can see, just something that must be done. You know that dad delivered plenty of babies and not once did he come home and talk about how amazing it was to cut the cord. Nor that any of those babies were meant to be his, or how bonded he was to them because he delivered them and cut the cord. It’s just part of the delivery and it’s nothing like what the mother and babe just went through. It’s just rather bizarre if you ask me, do fathers now routinely cut the cord at their child’s birth? Why would they want to? What is the purpose?
But it seems to be the defining aspect for some in adoption and I just don’t understand why, or what the benefit is. Perhaps it just falls under the too much information category for me. From the outside looking in – it seems the most logical assumption is that it is used as a symbolic severing of the mother and child, yet, it’s still a long time before those papers are signed, if they are signed, so is that another subtle form of pressure (intended or not) – for a mother and babe who still need to say hello, before the mother can begin to decide if she says goodbye? If that assumption is correct, do the prospective adoptive parents that take part understand how it could be added pressure on the mother to go through with the adoption instead of taking more time to decide? I hope not.
This post was triggered by an over-the-top inclusion of this failed adoption (started off with it) of a completely not relevant to the actual sad news story that was published in an UK paper that I will not be linking to. I had intended to do a post on this topic when it came to court transcripts and rulings but never got around to it,. Comments that open dialogue are welcome.