Monday morning snarky moment…

05 Aug


Oxymoron sentence I saw on an adoption forum…

paraphrased:                                                                                                                                  “Looking for examples of adoption flyers I can make to put up because our adoption agency hasn’t found any expectant moms in good situations.”

Methinks she doesn’t quite grasp the concept of why most expectant mothers would consider adoption for their baby. 


Posted by on August 5, 2013 in Adoption


Tags: , , , ,

24 responses to “Monday morning snarky moment…

  1. Snarkurchin

    August 5, 2013 at 4:36 pm

    Suggestion for flyer text:


    “MOTHER AND HER SITUATION MUST BE PERFECT. No drugs, no alcohol, no sex: IMMACULATE CONCEPTION BABY PREFERRED, as this is the only way we can know our baby’s father won’t have been in a bad situation.

    “MOTHER MUST ALSO BE INSANE (NOT the kind of insane her kid will inherit, just the kind that will make her hand her perfect baby over to me when her “situation” doesn’t force her to).

    “Mother must contact me at number below–I wore myself out dealing with adoption agencies, so someone owes me that perfect baby.

    “Mother must remember that, no matter how good or bad her situation might be deemed, I am better than she is. Mother must hand over baby and then die, because that would be the best situation for me.


    (Nobody’s taking the little number tabbies. How odd. Jesus, what’s wrong with you people? I only want *one*….for now.)


    • TAO

      August 5, 2013 at 4:59 pm

      I know we shouldn’t snark – but truly did she give it more than a passing thought as to why a mother would give up her baby? They are the ones who give adoption such a bad image, well, and those so-called adoptive parents like Hana’s….


      • Snarkurchin

        August 6, 2013 at 12:55 pm

        [snark off] She seems to think of grown women as things to be used for her ends. Society taught her this is the proper use of women all her life. If she gave a thought to the full “situation” in which relinquishing mothers find themselves, she night have to think about a lot of other depressing situations.

        I think adoption has its own horribleness, but it’s tangled up with all our other societal horribleness, and that makes it extra-hard to look at.


        • TAO

          August 6, 2013 at 4:35 pm

          You hit on a really valid point – society teaches us that women aren’t equal and are to be used and that is really sad. I am still shaking my head though – good situation? True also that the trickle down effect is seen most vividly in adoption…


    • everyoneactdead

      August 5, 2013 at 10:58 pm

      “White, healthy newborn preferred! We would be honored to cut the cord and room in at the hospital with the baby so we can start bonding ASAP!”
      “We would love an open adoption!!! Bmom must keep in touch so we can ask her questions or medical history as needed. Other than that, no contact that is uncomfortable or inconvenient for us.”

      “In the event of future pregnancies, ask us first so our little one may have a sibling!”


      • TAO

        August 6, 2013 at 4:42 pm

        you know they didn’t act like that before and it does cross the line where intended or unintended it creates a coercive atmosphere…


  2. shadowtheadoptee

    August 5, 2013 at 6:59 pm

    O.K. I just laughed out loud. I’m still laughing out loud. I’m going to keep laughing out loud, cause that PAP’s comment is just funny.

    Yep, that adoptee wont have any issues. lol


  3. shadowtheadoptee

    August 5, 2013 at 7:01 pm

    P.S. We aren’t supposed to be snarky? But…That just screams for snarky. lol


    • TAO

      August 5, 2013 at 7:05 pm

      Shadow’s back…

      Of course we can be snarky when it is called for and really that comment called for snark.


  4. Dannie

    August 5, 2013 at 7:08 pm

    What exactly does that mean!!!!!! Oh dear!


    • TAO

      August 6, 2013 at 4:38 pm

      It means someone like you Dannie…being pregnant and in a good situation…and why oh why can’t my agency find expectant moms like that…call me crazy but I can’t see you giving up your soon to be born child simply because you want to help someone else be a parent…


  5. eagoodlife

    August 5, 2013 at 11:10 pm

    Phew!!!That’s a good one!! Perhaps she needs to use a ‘breeding factory’!


    • TAO

      August 6, 2013 at 4:39 pm

      well von I was wondering if she was confusing surrogacy with adoption…


  6. Heather

    August 5, 2013 at 11:33 pm

    Wow … just wow.


  7. Luanne

    August 6, 2013 at 4:57 am

    Expectant moms in “good situations”? Waaaa?


    • Snarkurchin

      August 6, 2013 at 12:56 pm

      [snark on again] Translation: Women just like me, only desperate. (Gosh, why are there so few of them?)


  8. shadowtheadoptee

    August 6, 2013 at 4:27 pm

    I just read the comment again, and, oh, yes, I laughed out loud again, cause I just can’t help it. I mean, really, it’s so, completely, uhm, ignorant, what else can I do.

    Ooops, did I just call a pap ignorant? Shame on me. Bad bad, adoptee. It’s my BPs fault, cause they weren’t in a “good situation”. Oh, wait, no, it’s my APs fault cause they werent the perfect parents this particular pap will so, obviously, be. Uh, but, wait, maybe it’s not my parents, all four of them, fault, cause, after all, I’m almost 50 years old. You’d think at this age, I’d be better behaved? Ah, what the hell…
    A flyer?
    I want a puppy, pure bred, of course, and it should be house broken, and obedience trained as well. If not, I will bring it back, and expect a full refund of my money.

    Uhm, ooops, I mean child.


    • TAO

      August 6, 2013 at 4:40 pm

      it’s cringe worthy all right but no one tried to explain it to her…


  9. shadowtheadoptee

    August 6, 2013 at 5:56 pm

    Can I explain it to her? Oh, please, please, please..

    …ah, never mind, previous experience tells me, on second thought, it’d probably be a waste of time.


  10. Valentine Logar

    August 7, 2013 at 1:34 pm

    What does that mean? Why are some people so deficient?


  11. Jan Mayes

    August 8, 2013 at 11:02 pm

    I’m still just laughing so loud the neighbors in our office condo are banging on the walls! I wish I knew how to share this!


  12. cb

    August 9, 2013 at 1:16 am

    One suspects that many PAPs miss the “halcyon days” where sweet innocent young girls relinquished their babies in droves. These days, if they want the “ideal bmom”, they need to go to Utah where it is recommended by the church that single pregnant women “choose adoption”. I’d calll that religious coercion but what would I know.

    Anyway, there are advantages to have the “less than ideal emom” – one can go onto forums and blogs disparage her at every opportunity. Then again, one can do that with all emoms – one just needs to say “I thank her for choosing not to abort my child” – whether abortion crossed that emoms mind or not. Whenever I hear the “she chose life” thing, it always comes across as a direct link between adoption/abortion thus sounding as if the emom was thinking “Hmm should I abort this thing or give it to someone else” rather than making a choose between continuing and not continuing a pregnancy and then later considering the parenting future of one’s unborn child.


  13. Marijane Nguyen, MT-BC

    August 20, 2013 at 3:35 pm

    Wow, that’s unbelievable.



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