So the other day I went to get some stuff accomplished that I had put off till the very last-minute (I’m great at procrastination), I rushed in, grabbed the form, and sat down at the cubicle and started filling it in.
First Question: Current surname – I quickly wrote it down.
Second Question: Former surname – I couldn’t decide if they wanted my surname from 1st marriage, or my adopted surname, so I asked and was told it was for if I had been married before. I quickly wrote it down.
Third Question: Surname at birth – I stopped and thought – do they want the surname on my original birth certificate? or my surname on my amended birth certificate after my adoption? My mind is telling me they must want the surname on the amended birth certificate, that is my family surname on every other legal document and the only name I ever used, so I wrote that down. The problem is that even though I knew it was the right answer, based on how it was worded – surname at birth – it felt weird writing that down because mom and dad didn’t know I even existed when I was born. I know in the past they always asked for your parents names and that made it easier. I guess that is why it hit me the way it did, and why I was stymied by how the question was worded. How on earth are adoptees who were adopted after they are infants and know their surname at birth supposed to answer that, especially if the birth certificate that confirms it, is sealed away and there is an amended version?
One more example of why “was adopted” doesn’t work. I will always be adopted – I will always be reminded I am adopted in so many different ways, especially it seems, when I least expect it.