Can someone please explain why it is okay to use adult adoptees as poster children? You know it exploits the person, a human being.
From posts stating that Kaepernick shouldn’t be playing because he could have been aborted – despite the fact that there is zero indication in any news reports that it was even a possibility. Yet because he was adopted it apparently is fact to some who want that to be the focus. To twitter messages / instagram picture proclaiming he was also a foster child like Oher and how powerful adoption is, and who knows what else I thankfully did not see.
People did it to Steve Jobs as well – both before and after he passed. After he passed – the pro-life groups were excruciatingly vocal, at the very time when his family and friends were grieving the loss of a loved one. Did anyone stop and ask if this was appropriate? If it was even true? What his views were?
The above are just a few of many. Both the pro-adoption and the pro-life groups would be well served to consider how that plays out in reality, on the person and family.
Kaepernick was facing the biggest challenge of his very short career and yet everywhere you turned – not one word about how hard he worked, or how much he achieved in such a short career, or even about his poise and calm presence on the field. Only that if not for adoption he would have been aborted. If not for adoption he would never have achieved anything – that is the message sent. A poster child. Only what he can do for your cause. Not how all the *noise* might affect him.
I am glad I am not a famous adoptee – having my achievements proclaimed to be only because I was adopted. That the destiny of adoption combined with adoptive parents are the only reasons for famous adoptees success. It is a disturbing message to send. That we are destined to fail unless we are saved by adoption. That who we are, what skills and abilities we have combined with hard work, would not have been enough – except for adoption – we would have failed.
I sat and looked back at my life yesterday, and compared it to the life my siblings have who were raised by my mother. I can see no difference in how we all turned out. When I compare myself to my siblings through adoption there was no magic formula called adoption that made all the difference – we all have/had our own temperaments, skills, work ethics or lack there of, staying power, choices made, and no amount of being adopted changed that. The only thing I can see that is different because I was adopted was where I grew up, which made who I met along the way a different group of people.
What I would like to ask you to take away from this is that while adoption shaped our lives – it is not the only reason why we succeed or fail – we are all more than just adoption. We are human beings just like everyone else, capable of great things, or failure, and everything inbetween. Praise people for what they have achieved, encourage people to do the best they can. Don’t use them for poster children for your cause, unless they want to be.