A self-professed adoptive mother just stated that “health issues are often used as an excuse for continued contact by Adoptee Rights people“. No, that isn’t an exact quote (I cut some words) and comes from a forum I don’t normally read. Please note that I used self-professed because even though she states she is the adoptive mother of a teenager from Korea, it is hard for me to believe she is an adoptive parent. I can’t understand how someone who has been involved in adoption for well over a decade and is on-line, wouldn’t understand exactly what Adoptee Rights are about. Plus, how her use of the words “Adoptee Rights people” comes off insulting, and shows her complete and utter contempt by adding “people” combined with her obvious hatred strewn in her posts for those “random women” (aka the child’s mother).
It boggles my mind that if she really is an AP – that she is so bloody clueless and unfeeling. It shocked me! It makes me very thankful that I know so many adoptive parents who are NOT clueless, or unfeeling, and who stand up for Adoptee Rights and for mothers.
If anyone you know holds fallacies about what Adoptee Rights is all about, here is a primer created by Amanda at The Declassified Adoptee.
Send them to Amanda first, and then to the Adoptee Rights Coalition website to the post below that shows in a chart by state the laws and how each has state has different rules and options for adult adoptees. How few rights we have to our own original birth certificate.
Finally, as to the using “illness as an excuse“…okay that really burns me for two reasons. The first reason is obvious – it has NOTHING to do with Adoptee Rights!
The second reason it burns me is because of all people in this world who should give a damn about adoptees well-being, it is an adoptive parent. Implying we use it as an excuse is insulting. For any adoptee born in a closed state, if you get sick, and I mean sick enough to warrant a judge to unseal your sealed adoption record, it means you really needed it. Judges don’t like to unseal court records. In addition to trying to navigate the system while sick, the system of unsealing records is not done in a timely manner. If you are successful, you are left with decades old information about your mother, there is a good chance she has married and changed her name, moved, or already passed away. It took me 13 months after my events to make my first contact with my relative who knew about me. That is not even close to timely enough to help when you really need information.