Bullying has been on my mind for quite some time lately, and this past week has made me painfully aware of it again in the adoption world. I am not a dominant voice, or even a strong voice, but I will gladly lend my voice to my fellow adoptee voices this week, and every week.
What happened should not have happened. The outcome could have been different. The outcome did not have to be an outcome of division and angry words, it could have been an outcome of unity.
And it it’s not like racism is a brand new concept that has never been mentioned before by adult adoptees of color to white parents, (or even from other white parents). One of the best resources, JaeRan Kim talked about this for years at Harlow’s Monkey. The wealth of information available at your finger tips is just a click away, pages, and pages of information to guide you, teach you, if you have an open mind and want what’s best for your child. Knowledge that you need provided free of charge from someone who knows much better than any white non-adopted person ever will. Harlows Monkey
Yoon’s Blur has a post specifically about a day she experienced when she was 5…Kindergarten Racism Welcome to the Real World, Kid
There is no excuse for parents to not know this when strong adult adoptees and other white parents have spoken about this subject repeatedly, for years.
Racism is alive and well and burying your head in the sand will not make it go away. When you have people like those identified in this story (no I cannot even write their names they disgust me so much), you know racism is not going away anytime soon, so any chance a parent has to turn something into a teachable moment, has to be capitalized on.
And in case some of you have never read this blog, you need to read her post about this week. She is a great writer and has a strong direct way of speaking her mind. Shut Up and Listen
In other adoption related news there is this story ‘Identifying Nelson’: El Salvador Born, U.S. Man Searched For His Roots.
Fourteen years after his adoption, a call from a human rights advocate to his parents, Tom De Witt and Margaret Ward, turned their world upside down. “When my dad received that call,” De Witt said, “he almost fainted.”
The caller, activist Robert Kirchner with Physicians for Human Rights, told the couple that their son had been born in El Salvador, not Honduras, and that his biological parents were revolutionaries in the civil war. He also revealed the circumstances of De Witt’s early life.
Changing the topic completely, I thought I would share a link to The Spoon Theory as I would expect all of you to know at least one individual, that could relate to exactly what it means to have to schedule their life due to physical limitations, whether it is a disability or even just age. This story helped me when I was struggling to adjust to my new limitations, while at the same time dealing with people telling me “I Looked Great”.